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Permalink Reply by Judith on December 17, 2016 at 8:23pm

Unless they have experienced the same type of relationship that you had with your mom and then lost her, then they have no clue how to relate to you. I understand the need for people to listen tho!! People say 'mean' things through ignorance. They have no clue the pain of what they are saying.... I was 40 when my mother passed away... I owned my own home and had been there for her throughout over 3 1/2 years of dealing with cancer. However, I was asked if I thought I would grow up since she was gone. Talking about 'burning me up!" Then a very close relative told me that I had to get a grip or something similar when I was having a bad day and was stressed about other situations on top of that. Most people don't get it unless they have experienced it.... That is part of being human, I guess. I hope you find, if you haven't already, at least a couple of super friends to unload to... I was blessed with such. Maybe writing your feelings out would help, too. Don't know how you believe about God and after-life, but many times I ask God to tell my mother that I love her and that I miss her but I am okay. Not sure my ramblings help, but I do understand.... at least I believe I do. My mother has been gone for over 3 years... I am starting to cope better, I think, but I still have times..... I don't want to keep bogging my personal friends down.... So I thought I'd join this support group to be part of those who understand one another!