My husband passed away

My husband passed away last Saturday after a long illness. His memorial service is next week. We have three boys, ages 14, 11, and 6. I'm glad I found this place. It seems to be a place of great caring and support. I actually registered here a while before my husband's passing, as I was grieving for his loss after he entered a nursing home. He had been there since the end of 2008, after being diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease in 2006 and deteriorating quickly. He was only 58 when he passed.

 

The boys are doing fairly well. They feel that they had lost their dad awhile ago, and hadn't visited him very often due to the severify of his illness. For awhile now, I don't think he knew me when I visited.

 

I'm having a difficult time. Even though I had time to prepare for this, I didn't really feel prepared when he passed. This is very hard.

 

Thanks for this site. I'm sure I'll find comfort and support here.

 

Kelly

 

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Permalink Reply by anna l. on June 15, 2012 at 5:17pm

Hugs Kelly, it is a hard hard new world for all of us and not one we have a choice in.  I just spent 2 days giving day respite care to my brother so my sister could take care of her own health.  My brother was diagnosed with early onset dementia 2 years ago.  He is going downhill so fast it seems.  He is all alone since his wife died years ago and so is my sister so she is able to take care of him mostly.  It breaks my heart to see what life has done to my big brother.  I just wanted to let you know not only do I understand loosing your husband, I understand the pain of watching it happen.  Please feel free to contact me if ever need to "chat"

Permalink Reply by Dennis C. on June 16, 2012 at 6:42am
Kelly,

My beloved father in law died from Alzheimer's. My wife and I moved in with him to keep him home. When he got real bad we had Hospice nurses in every day. Finally he died in our arms. I still miss him very much. And the horrific process of the disease has left scars on our hearts.

Now my wife has just been diagnosed with her 4th occurrence of Ovarian cancer!!! We know what is coming.

I have learned something through all of this. You CANNOT ever be emotionally prepared for any of this. If you think you are - then your devastation will be even more acute.

We try to be emotionally and mentally prepared for what we see coming but we just can't be.

Instead I spend my energy on being spiritually prepared. My faith and HOPE based on what the Bible teaches us about death, resurrection, why we suffer, and what our hope is for the future is essential in enduring these great trials and tests to our very being. My hope doesn't take the pain away, But I recieve comfort, and purpose from what I know to be the truth about God's promises to us.

I am sooooo sorry for what you are dealing with. If there is anything I can do to help you please ask.

I will mention you by name in my prayers.

Dennis

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