Feeling Lost and Empty inside

My mother had been living in an assisted living facility since last Summer.  She was actually getting better and my and husband and I were thinking she would be able to move out this Summer.  She was living in Pennsylvania and we live in Connecticut.  On March 6th we received a call from Hospice that my mom was unresponsive and we needed to get there as soon as possible.  We drove like crazy for 8 hours and arrived there one hour before she died.  I still can't believe it happened.  Apparently she was told three days earlier she had a tumor on her trachea and there was nothing they cold do.  

I'm and only child and in my 40's.  My dad died in 1997 from a heart attack.  My mom was only 75.  I don't understand why this happened.  I don't have a large family.  I am married to a wonderful man and have two amazing children.  It just makes me so angry that I lost both my parents.  I feel so cheated.  It seems like all I want to do is cry.  My husband keeps saying it will get better, I don't want to hear that right now.  I'm feeling guilt because I didn't call her the weekend before she died.  I'm angry that she didn't call me and tell me, apparently she didn't want to worry me.

We were planning to visit her this coming weekend for Easter.  I don't know how to get through this.

Carolyn

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Permalink Reply by dream moon JO B on March 27, 2013 at 5:16pm

yes i no it to well th fealing u cud me a full pint of water but in sid my hert an my mums hert we r both hurt im my dads only blood i hav a harf sis and bro but hy dnt no whots it lik to loze a paret we do all i no it hurs so mush my mum and dad had me late in lif thy wear both 38 wen i com along now im 38 it jst feals lik our heartss hav bean ripit out lik its bean replases by a emtey 1 wish the beat gose to fast tht i cant control it sory if iv saed the wong words all i no its hard to hard 

Permalink Reply by Bonnie Jacobs on May 10, 2013 at 11:08pm

Yes, it is too hard!  I just lost my daughter and I, too, feel like my heart has been ripped out. I will say a prayer for you and know that you are not alone.

Permalink Reply by Dennis C. on May 11, 2013 at 7:09am
Carolyn,

I am so sorry for your loss.

A wise man once said:

Comfort

“ If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair. ”

Yes, comfort is very important. It doesn't take the pain away, but it helps us get through, like a cool salve on a burning wound.

HOPE is also very important. Again, it doesn't take the pain away, but it gives us something to hold onto when all seems lost.

I get the most comfort and hope from my studies of the Bible.

If there is anything we can do to help, just ask.
Permalink Reply by Bonnie Jacobs on May 11, 2013 at 3:14pm

Thank you Dennis. I appreciater your words.  If there is anything in the bible that you would like to share I would like to know .  Thanks again.

 

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