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Permalink Reply by Donna on October 21, 2012 at 10:35pm

Sorry you're having a tough day - I had dinner with 2 of my children (31 year old son, 29 year old daughter), my sons girlfriend, my 4 month old granddaughter, and one of my stepsons (also 31 years old). I told them, this weekend had been really tough, it seems to be getting harder, I can't believe how much I miss my husband and I'm pissed! I am trying to trust God, and live one day at a time, and stay busy, and reach out and ask for help, and be grateful for the time we had, but its not easy. And in addition to trying to process all my emotions and keep them from pulling me under, I'm buried under insurance forms, and medical records, and police reports, and trying to get Medicare, figure out if i make enough money to live on, should I stay in the house with too much space and upkeep or find a small affordable condo, etc, etc. And my other step-son, an active drug addict, is bugging his brother about how they should get in touch with the estate lawyer so they can figure out how much money they're going to get, and how soon. I keep trying to tell them the accident lawyer said it could be a year or more, and we can't settle the estate until the accident is settled. Some days it's all too much! Im happy to be curled up in bed with my puppy next to me and watching sitcoms on tv, almost ready for sleep, hoping tomorrow is a better day! So, I don't know what the weather is like today in CA, I'm on the east coast and learned how to run the snow blower today, but I know you replying to my post last night helped me realize I'm not alone, I'm not the only one that feels this way. So thanks for that. Maybe together we can get through this - no, life will never be the same, but maybe it can be good in a different way. I definitely don't feel like I have the same purpose either, but I must still have a purpose cause I'm still here, so guess I gotta figure out what it is.

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Permalink Reply by Joanne Welch on October 31, 2012 at 11:08am

I understand how you feel.  I lost my husband 6 months ago.  It's been really bad for me too lately - maybe the upcoming holidays.  I don't have kids and we didn't have much family and never really did anything for the holidays, but at least we were together.  Now I'm all alone.  It's hard to find a reason to keep going.  I feel like I have no purpose and nothing matters without him.  I try to just get through each day and hope one day it will be better like everyone says, but it's not happening.  It's just so hard without him. 

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