Collin Bentley
  • Male
  • Bakersfield, CA
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 43 and recently lost my brother to liver failure. I work for the County and have had a really difficult year. I am usually a easy going person that has always worked and volunteered to help people. I enjoy going to the gym and studying theology. I have a home in Utah that I hope to retire to and bounce between California and Utah. I love the outdoors and have been doing some research into how to live off the grid. Eventually I would like my wife and I to live very simply, go fishing and on occassion go see the wonders of nature.
About my Loss:
About a month ago I lost my brother after a very long battle with liver failure. He was a very bad alcoholic and it simply consumed him. He was a very nice person but just drank till it was too late. For the last five years my family has lived in a constant state of alert, he was in and out of the hospital. His wife was very unsupportive and left him about three months before he passed. I also lost my best friend from high school about 6 months ago. My work has been brutally unsympathetic and I have been have some health issues associated with my work.
Are You a Service Provider? If Yes, please tell us about your service.
No. I work for a County Mental Health Department as a case manager and I have worked in a hospital setting for about three years. I did spend the last month of my brother's life with him, helping my parents care for him. just did the basic CNA stuff. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. My brother was 49.

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Life is starting to get a little better...

Back on April 6th (Good Friday) I lost my brother to liver failure.  My family has been dealing with his struggle for several years.  The last 6 months he really started to go downhill and his health just sunk.  He was on Hospice and I had time off from work so I was able to help care for him the last month of his life.  It was very painful to see his health fail but certainly was glad to be able to care for him.  This event was the hardest thing I have ever had to go through.  It was so…

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Posted on May 4, 2012 at 11:52am — 2 Comments

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At 10:05pm on May 9, 2012, Rebecca Ward said…

I will for sure. I am glad you were able to be there for him in his last month. I am sure it was painful...but you got to take care of him.

 
 
 

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Gary Ruby is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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"is griefshare a website like this?"
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Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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