Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
Sudden and traumatic fits what happened to my daughter all to well. On the morning of Nov 10 2011 my girls were getting ready for school. I was happy to be home because usually I was already at work by that time. My house was full of chatter as my son went out the door eager to get to school a few minutes earlier than usual, and the girls were getting dressed and talking about the new wii game they had gotten the night before. I sat on the sofa and had coffee while they put their things together. Julie decided that she wanted to bring her bike to school, but her little sister wanted to walk so the girls said goodbye and I said I'd see them later and that I loved them and they were out the door.
I had a busy day ahead of me so I picked up a few things around the kitchen and headed to take a shower. I heard sirens and thought that was hearing a lot of them lately. Then there was a pounding at the door. At first I thought that it was just a random neighbor being annoying so I ignored it and and continued to get ready for my shower, than I heard shouting and more pounding at the door so I decided to answer..
The principal from my girls school was at the door, this was NOT normal.. My mind was racing so I almost didn't grasp what she said.. "There was an accident, Isabella is okay, but Julianna was hit by a car"..
I can still hear her voice over and over again.. sometimes when ration abandons me I think that is I hadn't opened the door that morning I would still have my Julie... but I know that isn't true.
I was told that I should go to the hospital right away, that they were bringing her there, and that gave me a little hope. On the way there my youngest daughter Isabella told me that when they were walking across the street they saw a car coming and that she ran as fast as she could to get away from the car but the car hit Julie. Bella said that the car went all the way over Julie and Julie was asleep on the ground behind the car, but that the lady told her it was okay because Julie's heart was still beeping. .. It was so traumatic to hear those words from the mouth of my then 6 year old baby.
A few minutes later, which felt like hours, I was finally in the ER and my daughter was being brought in from the Ambulance. I was pulled aside by a nurse who spoke very very slowly to me.. she said that they had tried to get a helicopter for Julie but that her heart had stopped and they decided to bring her in the ambulance, she said that they were not able to get Julie's heart to start back up. She asked me if I understood what that meant, I nodded,, but I don't think I really understood, all I could think about was getting to see her.
She brought me back to where they had her laying on the gurney, they were poking at her and shocking her chest with paddles, then stopping to do chest compression.. at some point I was sitting there holding her hand and everyone got silent.. I just knew it was over, I knew they were done.. I even felt that they were doing a little extra just to make me feel that they were giving it their all.. My little girls heart had not beat in over an hour, she had actually died before she was even in the ambulance while I was still getting ready for my shower.. I knew that she was no longer in the body I was clinging too..
Julianna was 9 years old, and looking forward to her 10th birthday, which was to be 2 days later.
The woman that ran over my daughter has never apologized, she never got so much as a ticket, recently the DA of Yuba County decided not to press criminal charges.. because she "seemed remorseful" and was going through "a lot". Her ex husband and the father of her 4 children committed suicide a few days after my daughter died so the DA as sympathetic, even thought the driver was uninsured and provided false insurance info to the police on the scene, even thought she admitted to arguing with the children in the back seat. the DA threw out the witness statements that said that they had seen her speeding shortly before the accident, or that they had seen her on her phone, or that she was twisted around in her seat talking to the kids behind her. She said the sun was in her eyes preventing her from seeing my girls in the street... I have a petition for her case to be viewed again by the DA without bias.. I am hoping with all the last bits of hope that I have that the DA will consider Julie's case so that my son and my daughter can see that what happened to their sister was not okay..
more can be read and followed at facebook.com/forjulianna and her petition is at http://www.change.org/petitions/justice-for-julianna
Thank you for reading. :(
M
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going thru your loss and writing about it would be something that would nail me to the floor.You arfe very brave.It teaches me alot about grief .
Mandy, I just read your post and my heart aches for you. Everyone tells me that I am brave but I know how you feel and what you are going thru. I lost my husband 7 months ago and his killer has not been arrested, not even a suspect and the police do not seem to care that he was my life and someone took him from me. We were only married 3 years. Stay strong and I hope you can get justice for your little girl.
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