Thank you! I need support right about now!

Hi, thank you for being here. I’m so glad I found this site. My heart is aching and everything around me just seems to be a blur. I have managed to keep our secret for the majority of my life so for some reason sharing it almost feels like a betrayal.
Our love and our relationship have been our secret for the past 25 years. No one has ever known. We are both in our third marriage but we have never been able to let go…..we have never wanted to. Over the years we’ve lost contact but we always seem to find each other again. He even moved across state lines just so we could be closer together. He loves his wife and I love my husband but this has always been something different….. something unshakable.
He called me yesterday to tell me he has stage four cancer. I’m not even sure what he said after that. I have loved him for more than half my life and I can’t imagine this world without him in it. There’s never been a A written letter between us, not a single photograph ever taken..only moments that have created memories I’ll cherish forever. When he’s gone I’ll have no one left to share these memories with they will be mine alone. They’ll be no one to share my grief with..it will be mine alone.