I lost my only sister just over a month ago. I don't know how to explain it. Even though I am younger than she was, I loved her like she was my baby sister. It's odd I know, but somewhere in my heart I'd sort of decided I was going to take care of her. 

She'd always taken care of me so I decided that the only way I could show her how much that meant to me was to be to her what she was to me. I feel lost without her now.

On top of it all, i'm so angry with myself. She just had a small flu, I should have gone and taken care of her. If I'd done that she wouldn't have had to go to the hospital for a check up and she would still be here today. I feel like I have let her down, that I failed her. She was going to be a mom in April. All of this is too much for me. My sister and I had been through so many difficult times but we always told each other that things would get better for us someday and we'd be ok. Now she's gone and I'm here alone.