Hi Joe,  Welcome!  Glad you are here.  And thanks for joining the zoom meeting tonight.  

I want to thank Ms. Diana for starting this group and having the Zoom meeting.  I think this will be good for all of us.  I wasn't sure what to except, but glad I jumped into it.  I hope all of us gain something we need.  Thank you again Ms. Diana.    

My pleasure.  We ALL need this!

Welcome to the group Jennifer and Nicole!

Welcome Ash, Carly, Amalia, David, Shannon and Gen.  Glad you have joined!  

Hi, I lost my ex husband 2 years ago. He was still my best friend. It was unexpected. I have a lot of grief and no one to talk with when it comes up. When does this group meet and can I join in? Thanks.-Alisa

Yes, Salome, you are welcome to join us.  Here are the details:  

Topic: Grief Support
Time: Jan 4, 2021 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Every week on Mon, 
Jan 11, 2021 07:00 PM
Jan 18, 2021 07:00 PM
Jan 25, 2021 07:00 PM
Feb 1, 2021 07:00 PM
Feb 8, 2021 07:00 PM
Feb 15, 2021 07:00 PM
Feb 22, 2021 07:00 PM

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81596390272?pwd=eDR4emtqczN2Q3ZJWHVaUW45S...

Meeting ID: 815 9639 0272
Passcode: 249611

Diana, thanks for the chance to help me with my grief.  I would like to introduce myself briefly.  One of the members spoke of their multiple losses, childhood abuse, and issues including ptsd from serving in the military.  I can empathize because I grew up in a dysfunctional family and dealt with neglect, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse from family and neighbors growing up.  There was a series of losses - from my younger brother, first love, and friends that lead me into addictions.  I escaped by joining the military at 17.  My multiple deployments overseas left me with horrific guilt and shame at things that I saw and did during my service.  I ended up with broken marriages, mental issues, and a bitterness towards myself that was self-destructive and on occasional aimed outward towards others.  I had a daughter with one of my abusers - lost my beautiful baby girl to aa assault and murder.  Another marriage fell apart, because I didn't want to deal with the grief and wasn't suppose to - that's what MEN were taught to do - hold it all in, suck it up, and drive on.  I had a son from my 2nd marriage - but lost him for years because his mother was using him as pawn after the divorce.  I had unhealthy relationships and addictions until I met my Melanie - she was a recovering alcoholic and met her in a recovery meeting.  She was my rock and my heart - a beautiful woman that was smart, witty, and gave unconditional love.  We were together for years before deciding o marry.  It was a good coupleship except for those demons that I had never dealt with returned and I nearly lost her because of my addictions triggered with my son nearly died.  The last few years had been difficult ones but we were slowly becoming better as we both dealt with our own pasts.  Then the 29th of October, 2019 - she and I had a wonderful and loving night together.  She had retired in August of 2018 and I was going to retire November of 2019 - we were looking forward to both being retired and having "our" time together.  The morning of the 30th of October, 2019 - she woke me complaining about being sick to her stomach and hurting in her chest.  I remember how cold and sweaty she felt.  We went to the ER - and that evening after 17 hrs of suffering, she passed away.  In less than 24 hrs - I lost my partner, lover, and other half.  Since she passed, I have been lost and not able to move forward.  The world has gone on.  I haven't gotten rid of any of her things - I can't bear the thought of it.  Sometimes being alone - especially with the isolation of the pandemic have gotten overwhelming to the point that I gave my son my weapons safe to keep because I selfishly want to join my wife, but know in my heart that I have to carry on for my son and his girlfriend.  I have dealt with my addictions for nearly 3 yrs now - and will continue to do so to honour the memory of my wife, but I know I am just a shell that needs help with this deep grief that I have because I miss my wife so much.  That's all for now - except to say [write] thank you again Ms. Diana for the meetings and the group.  I hold that I can get to know some of the other members and that together we can all heal.  Thanks for the chance to write this.        

Joe, I read what you wrote.  First, I am so glad you gave your weapons to your son. That was a wise move. I have done something similar 5 years ago.  It's just safer that way.  

Addiction is a hard road; one that I am very much familiar with - we can talk more about that if you wish.  

Thank you for your kind words! And by sharing with each other we will help each other heal.  I look forward to our Zoom meetings!  Talk to you soon.  

I can't attend at the times this group meets. Are there any grief groups that meet earlier in the day?

Salome, Not at this time but we plan on having another group in the near future. What days and times would work best for you?

This article really hit home for me.  

https://pughfh.com/343/Grief-in-the-Workplace.html  

Backstory: My grandparents adopted me and I called them mom and dad.

In 2001 my dad/grandfather and my brother passed away.  Long story, but I ended up losing my job because of grief.  Then in 2014, my mom/grandmother and cousin/best friend passed away.  Again, I struggled with grief and ultimately lost my job because I wasn't as upbeat as I once was.  Grief is difficult.  Grief is messy.  It ultimately led me to become a grief counselor - but don't be fooled by the title.  I still struggle.  Most grief counselors become counselors because of what they went through.  It's a journey/a lifelong process that can only be met one step/day at a time.  At least that is my opinion.  Wishing everyone a blessed day.  See you Monday evening.  

Good article Diana. I feel blessed that I had a job with a small agency and the staff were supportive and amazing. Even tho this is true, maybe eventually things could have Turned out differently. But because I was in a car crash 8 months after my BEAR Chris passed away,  I was unable to work shortly afterwards. I’ve never been able to return to work, and that choice was also taken away from me. However, PTSD and Grief were enough for me to work on and thro. Praying and sending healing energy to all. 

Sorry I missed Monday, had a lot on my plate and needed to have some alone time. I will do my best to be on tomorrow night and play my flute for you all.

Shannon Gimenes, We missed you!  I think I can speak for all, we look forward to hearing you play your flute.  See you tomorrow.

Appreciate the meeting last night - enjoyed Mister Shannon's' flute playing as a treat.  The topic was a difficult one but I am just grateful for a place where folks with similar experiences with losses.  Thank you all.   

Zoom meeting tonight at 7pm ET.  What topics would you like to discuss?

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81596390272?pwd=eDR4emtqczN2Q3ZJWHVaUW45S...

Meeting ID: 815 9639 0272
Passcode: 249611

I really benefited from last night's zoom meeting.  Often I feel alone in my issues but last night helped me to realize I am not alone and I'm not unique.  My spirits were uplifted.  Thanks to all of you!

Ms. Diana, I think the last Monday meeting was very supportive to myself and perhaps others as well.  I believe you are unique as you have gone out of your way to give us a place to come and share, learn we aren't alone, and maybe feel a little better.  Thank you for doing the meetings and thank you for you.

Zoom meeting tonight at 7pm ET.  

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81596390272?pwd=eDR4emtqczN2Q3ZJWHVaUW45S...

Meeting ID: 815 9639 0272
Passcode: 249611

Ongoing Virtual Grief Support Group 

Topic: Grief Support
Time: 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Every week on Monday

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81596390272?pwd=eDR4emtqczN2Q3ZJWHVaUW45S...

Meeting ID: 815 9639 0272
Passcode: 249611

Join us!

Good morning Diana,

It's Catharine. I am doing this right. Am I to contact in this form? Can you please when you have time, show me were to connect with you. Thank-You.

Catharine

Catharine,

Go to my profile page http://www.onlinegriefsupport.com/profile/DianaYoung

and then click on "send message".  

Our online Grief Support group via Zoom has changed to Wednesday evenings at 7pm ET. See you then.