Ben Holifield
  • Male
  • Little Rock, AR
  • United States
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About Me:
I am a 33 year old man from Little Rock, AR struggling to deal with the loss of my fiancee. She truly was the most amazing woman I have ever known and I often wonder just how I will get through all of this. I am currently finishing up my masters degree and then I'll start on my Phd in the classics.
About my Loss:
My fiancee was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 7 months ago and passed away last month (09/19/11). We were supposed to get married on 11/11/11 and had even moved the date up to 09/10/11 when we realized that she wasn't doing well but they had to put her in a medically enduced coma on that date. I am so torn with a mixture of emotions ranging from anger, fear, saddness, hate, grief, and a great deal more. Though I am a rational man, I still find myself trying to explain this to myself with no luck.

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At 3:46pm on October 27, 2011, mercy said…
Ben, she is soooo gorgeous; I'm really sorry that she had to die so young.
At 12:51pm on October 27, 2011, Amanda Ab said…

Hello Ben,

I am sorry for the loss of your beatiful fiancee. I am sure she was as beatiful from the outside as she was from the inside. We all here are on the same page of mixed emotions. I continue to ask the Why? all the time and I have still to find an answer almost 6 months after my husband's death. There is just days that are so sad and feel like not knowing for how long more will I keep on moving forward. It is real hard to move on with such a loss. There is many great people on this site which I have met and helped me share my feelings and all of them understand because they too have lost a loved one.

Thank you

 
 
 

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Gary Ruby is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Nov 5
Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
Oct 21
Natasha commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"is griefshare a website like this?"
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Morgan Sangrouber is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Oct 10
Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
Sep 26
Kali added a discussion to the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
Sep 26

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