Melissa Ann Smith
  • Female
  • Needles, California
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 38 years old, & I am from the San Diego area originally but I moved to Fort Mohave, Arizona in the spring of 1988 when my son Andrew was only a year old, & I was only 17 years old @ the time! I lived in the Fort Mohave area until the spring of 2008, then I moved across the Colorado River back to California, Needles to be exact to start a new life after my son & mother passed away!!!
About my Loss:
I found my eldest son not breathing on my parents living room floor face first not breathing very early on in the morning of November 27 th, 2008! So I tried waking him up to no avail, so I called 911 & the operator told me to turn him over & perform CPR on him, but he was way too heavy to do that so luckily I lived on a street that had a fire station on the corner so it only took moments for the paramedics to arrive, so they did all they could for him too & they told me that they pronounced him dead right there on the living room floor!!! To me, it looked like my angel was asleep & very peaceful!!! So to make a long story short, my son passed away in his sleep @ only 18 years of age due to a seizure!!! That is why it looked like he was sleeping!!! I will ALWAYS have that picture of him in my head forever!!! Ok, down the road about three years later on June 25 th, of 2008, my beloved mother passed away @ only 69 years of age, & my mother was the one who I could ALWAYS turn to whenever I had a problem, & she made me feel better about whatever situation or problem that I may have had @ the time, now for the very first time in my life, I feel sooo alone that it hurts!!! Loosing my son just totally destroyed what happiness that I will ever have again, & then to loose my mother, well, you tell me how I am supposed to feel or go on with my life because I do not even want to be alive anymore!!!

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At 2:32pm on September 20, 2009, jackie steinbock said…
i am new to this computrer i have never had one before but i need to be able to talk to other people that have lost their sons daughter i feel so alone and sometimes i dont evev know if i can go on with out him. his name is nathaniel and most ofr time i called him nate.hedied on april8 2009 only five months ago and sometimes it feells like the pain of his loss is even getting worse evey day i am not sure how to use this computer but please try to right me back i feel nso lost without him he was 25 but he still live4dme he struggled with drugs alcoho even though i got sober 10 years ago the damage and hurt i caused him had already been done
 
 
 

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Gary Ruby is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Nov 19
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Julie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Nov 5
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Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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Natasha commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"is griefshare a website like this?"
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Morgan Sangrouber is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
Sep 26
Kali added a discussion to the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
Sep 26
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