i get so angy at the man that did this to my husband.  He was already doing 25 to life when he killed Randy and they prosecuted him and gave him another 25 to life.  I think he should die.  Anger always turns into tears. it was such a senseless crime.  I feel so helpless and sad.  Randy was so young...only 40 years old.  We had our whole lives ahead of us and this man took that away.  it just isn't right.  Does anyone else feel this way?

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it isnt right. at all. my older sister was takn away by a selfish ex boyfriend. he shot her than turned the gun on himself. my anger always turns to tears. and my therapist always points out how angry i am but i think what you feeling is normal. you cant put a fake smile on your face and pretend life is okay. this isn't a movie, its very real no one thinks it can happen to them. its not right, my sister had three YOUNG children. she had her whole life and i will never get to see or be with her.

belinda, I am so very sorry to hear about your loss.  it isn't easy.  i get so angry I just cry and cry.  I try my best to carry on but when i am alone is when the tears come.  This month on the 31st will be one year and it seems just like yesterday i lost him and i lost my life and my purpose for living.  i would never committ suicide, but there are time i just want to sleep and not wake up.  i want to be with  him wherever he may be.  he was my soul mate.

 

what does your therapist suggest you do with your anger?  mine says to journal which I do everyday and it seems to help.

well, my therapist makes me more angry. he just keeps telling me how angry i am. he says i should not swear cause it makes me more angry, but i cry when i am alone too. it just pours. and i think journaling is awesme. i really do. i think your allowed to be angry. i think crying is good! even jesus cried! and this man was your soul mate! its allowed! its healthy in my opinion i get so many people who tell me to just move on and they would not want you to be sad or what not but grief and its process cannot heal overnight. and of course your going to be sad around the anniversary. i was a wreck on  mothers day because thats when my sister died, and i lost my mom last september. keep journaling and on his anniversarry allow yourself to cry. its healing. cleansing. but you still have purpose too, never ever forget that!
Thank You Belinda.  I journal to Randy.  I talk to him through my jornaling.  it is so healing and i have dealt with the grief process this way and with the anger too.
I feel this way. my bf was murdered , they caught the guys and now one of the murderers appeal has gone through and is getting another trial... I feel this is unfair to the families and myself. i feel fear, anger, depression all of my orginal greaving process has come back ten fold. im going to need to seek professional help for panic attacks. Yes im mad that i need to relive this terrible time of my life over again. Seriously speaking any judge on earth that would give this murderer another court hearing is insane..
i am sorry about your loss.:( and i think those men that did that to your bf should be put away. i have bad panic attaacks too :(
Belinda I am sorry to hear about your sister. Im angry reading the story behind it and i feel your anger is normal and justified. its a senseless crime. How can someone be so selfish as to take away a mother of 3, a sister, a daughter..
thank you. he turned the gun on himself. its selfish. i wish i could show him the pain and loss he did to the family. its not fair. but know panic attacks are common kirstal. do not let anyone tell you you are crazy! ever.

Ty i am feeling a like my husband cant and doesnt understand what im going through, ive been researching some doctors to hopefully help me through this .

 

they will. but watch for some quack drs. and its hard for your husband to understand. i wish my boyfriend could too. i pray your research will help! one day they will subside. you must allow yourself to grieve or it gets worse. maybe your husband should go with you to a therapy session or something so he can understan what you are going thru a bit more
Belinda. I also feel like anger is a part of the grieving process and you cant move on till its out of your system, dont let your therapist tell you other wise. I mean its not something you can just shutoff.
thank you. i agree. he just tells me how angry i am. not how to treat it. i do need it out of my system. thank yoU! no one understands this around me

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It was not supposed to be like this

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