As far as everyone saying it's get better each year, I can't say that I have. Going on 4 years May 5, since I lost my husband. I an a walking zombie, I have no joy in my life except my sweet little dog Babie J. Sometimes I think animals know what we are going through instead of human beings. My family thinks things are just find, never once when I talk to them do they ask my how I am doing. All I can do is hope and pray that God will take me so I can be with my wonderful Husband, Julian. 

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agrea so t im dredin 3.3.12 agan evry yr im a rec

aww, such a beautiful pictures!!  I just came across your post while looking on here.  Lost my Mom 2 years ago.. it's brutal.  I'm sorry about your husband :(

Thanks Jo & Jane for sharing sorry about your loss, I don't think things will ever get better.

He's your angel now. Please know you truly are not without him.
Lovely picture! I can see and feel the happiness you shared. If we could only turn back time for a while and revisit these happy times!

I miss my husband so much, I just wish I could join him, I pray for God to take me. Everyday is so hard being without him. Thanks everyone

for your nice comments

Well, it has arrived....anniversary #2. Not just yet...I need some self taunting first. I can't help it. Like Linda and morgan and everyone else, nothing changes....days fold into days and the darkness and despair excels. So, I must be taunted until April 29th. A whole month to ponder our marriage. So perfect, so gentle, so filled with unconditional love for one another. A marriage I could never duplicate or want to. I just want to be by her side. For an eternity. This pain is like nothing zI have ever felt and it belongs to me whetehr I want it or not. I do Not....I want Nancy. I want to hold her hand and walk through the mall again, to dance a poorly executed waltz again, to laugh together. To Live.  To Live.

Mel,

I sure can relate to your post I will be going on year 4, May 5. Not a single thing has been better in my life. I just am waiting for my day to join my Husband.

I can totally relate Linda. It has been 4 years and 2 mnths. for me, and it doesn't get any easier. My heart goes out to all of you too. We can understand each other, when anyone that hasn't been through this can understand. I could never have imagined this endless feeling of despair without my husband. I sure hope i see him again but who knows? Sometimes i feel he is there helping to lift me up when i am down, but it could be just my imagination? All we have left are our precious memories and the life we used to have, :(

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