My name is Susan I am 49 and unmarried. My Mom jsut died yesterday. She was sick for two weeks. I lived with her. I am disabled. I had a problem with depression , and then about 15 years ago developed a chronic illness Called POTS. That kept me from moving out. I was extremely close with my MOM. She helped me get through everything. She was the one person I could count on. She gave me unconditional love at a time when others were jsut blamed me or disbelieved me. She's alwasy been there. SHe's been my best friend and therapist. I've alwasy been terrified of how I could live without her. ANd now it has happened. I'm so scared. I already got comments from the family about how I have to change and get a job etc. I'm trying to get through the hardest thing in my life. ANd that's the support I get? I"m scared. I wasnt support and love not a scolding

I'm scared because I odn't know how or where I will live and the one person I would run to now is gone. I've lost so much already. It hurts so bad and I am scared that people will jsut hurt me.