Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Debra Waszut on April 17, 2013 at 7:48am

I lost my husband of 33 years about a year ago at age 54 suddenly to a massive heart attack. We cannot understand why these things happen.  But trust me it was God deciding it was her time.  I really believe that is the only answer.  To find peace with this I have let God take control, something I am not sure I did until this happened to me.  I loved him more than my own life and I know he is at peace knowing I will survive this. You will too. It will take time and support from your friends and family.  Get into a Griefshare group if there is one near you (google it).  It helped me so much. Good luck and prayers to you.

Permalink Reply by Jenny on April 17, 2013 at 8:55am

Thank you! I cannot imagine losing my husband. We have been married for almost 20 years and that would kill me. After my sister died, I felt like putting all four of my kids and husband in a bubble. I didn't want to lose anyone else. I lost my father five years ago and then my best friends brother died very close to when my sister died. We both (my best friend and I) buried our siblings on the same day, at the same time, in different states. It was so odd. I depend HIGHLY on my faith and my love for God. He really does strengthen me. I find myself praying a lot. I need to look into that group, thank you!!! I appreciate your kindness:) Many hugs to you!

Permalink Reply by Dolly on June 1, 2013 at 9:35am

On May 2 this year I found my 22 year old son dead in his bed.  We were on vacation at the beach, and were totally blindsided by his death.  He was physically disabled, so it was often hard to tell if something was wrong...he couldn't talk but a few "words" such as "uh huh" for yes, and only could move one arm on his own so he couldn't even really point to something that hurt...as far as we knew he was OK...but obviously we were wrong.  The ER doctor said it was cardiac arrest due to natural causes.  We don't have any idea what those 'natural causes' could be though.  I feel so guilty..I thought he was just sleeping late..all of us were sleeping late every day so it didn't even occur to me to worry about it...the most horrible thing I have ever experienced was finding him already gone when I thought he was sleeping...I am so sorry that you lost your sister so suddenly and in such a seemingly senseless way...she was so young, and I'm so sorry that she was alone and had nobody to help her...I don't think anything helps us with the horror and agony such deaths cause...they say time does, but I doubt it...anyway I wanted to say I'm so sorry you had to go through this and your sister and family too...hugs to you all..

Permalink Reply by Jenny on June 1, 2013 at 9:43pm

I am SO terribly sorry that you just recently lost your son. I cannot imagine. My mother is in such mourning. Just know that you did nothing wrong by letting him sleep a little longer. I hope you don't dwell on that. It was obviously his time to go, but still, we always wish they were still here with us:( Thank you for your kind words, I appreciate it. I hope you have a lot of family to help support you and hug you:) Many blessings!

Permalink Reply by Elley on June 8, 2013 at 7:46pm

Hi jenny Im so sorry for your loss .I too lost my only sister suddenly nov last yr.I know how deep the pain goes and sometimes its unbearable to think of living the rest of my life without my sister.Some days are better than others and the last 7mo my children and husband are all that kept me going.I know theres nothing I can say that can take the pain away but maybe just knowing you are not alone will help.Thats how I have felt the last 7month so alone and empty. Im a stay at home mom so its been easy for me to isolate and I just have had no desire to b around people.I finally broke down and signed up for a grief group which starts this week because I need to know Im not alone and going crazy.Grief is a place Ive never been before and I just hope that being around others who are going through it will help.Sorry for rambling if u ever want to chat Im here

Permalink Reply by Jenny on June 8, 2013 at 9:32pm

Thank you Ellen. I haven't met anyone yet who has lost their sister. I know that there are older people who have lost their sister (elderly ladies) but no one this young. My sister never even had a chance to get married, or have children like me. I am always thinking "what if". I am also a stay at home mom and dealing with my kids and hubby has kept me from dwelling on it, but there are times (like when I go to sleep at night) that I think about her. Or when I go on facebook and see her page that is still open. Or photos. Whatever it is. Death is hard to deal with, especially when the person dies tragically. I felt like I never got to say goodbye. Thanks for chatting with me, I appreciate it:) I am sorry that you know how I feel:(