Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Yetzy L. Diaz on May 21, 2012 at 9:19pm

I completely know how you feel, i have lost my older sister.  It has be almost a 1 1/2 months and i still want to think this a nightmare. I wish she never had left.  My older sister died and I couldn't say good-bye.  I also wish i could of been there for her longer.  i wish i wasn't so upset at her and would you help her more.  I feel like if i wasn't a good sister. 

Permalink Reply by Wendy on September 18, 2012 at 2:46am

Dear Yetzy,

It's been just over 9 months since I last saw my sister Mandy. Since I got the scent of her lavender perfume which stayed in the room even after she'd left, and since I held her hand, which was always surprisingly warm even in the coldest of weather. Strange how these little memories just seem to be popping up recently. Things I always took for granted and never really thought of have suddenly become the only things that help me feel even a little like the person I used to be.

I'd like to share a little something with you to hopefully help you. 

I also had resentment about something at the time. I was mad about something or the other...it's not even important anymore, my whole point is this...I never stopped loving her. Even when we were mad at each other the very idea that we didn't love each other anymore never even crossed our mind. That is the kind of love sister's have for one another. We were living Yetzy...that's what we were doing. The normal kind of bickering and minor annoyances which we can be such drama queens about at the time, fade in comparison to the love sister's share. 

My sister often got annoyed with me, because well, I was her little sister and I was always in her hair...if i was happy, if i was sad, if I was bored, if i had some new accomplishment i wanted to share...i went to her first. And it never occurred to me that she might be busy or that she might be going through a bad time...I just went headlong into whatever it was i needed to discuss. I wasn't being selfish...I was being her kid sister. It took me a long time to understand that without beating myself up. I had just always assumed my older sister would be there to help me. 

It was only in the last few years that my older sister became like my kid sister. It was a complete role reversal:) And no matter how many people today feel that I only ever had time for my older sister and have conveniently chosen this time that I'm alone and have no-one to turn to, to humiliate me and leave me standing alone Side note: Some human beings really are such prizes ;)...NOT FOR A SECOND DO I REGRET IT! The time I spent with her was awesome! I just wish I could have had more of it. She left me with a lifetime of memories, as I'm sure your sister has for you too. 

I cherish every moment that she annoyed me, made me cry, made me laugh, jabbed me with her elbow, pinched me or just hugged me until I couldn't breathe! 

So Yetzy...if you had a relationship with your sister, no matter whether you were smiling, or mad at each other...the love and bond you two share is never going to be in question. That is something that will remain untarnished because I believe that the love between sister's comes from God...and His love cannot be shaken by mere moments of anger which always recede. 

From one younger sister to another...we both have had older sister's whom we will definitely still recognize at heaven's gate's when our journey here ends and the new one begins. Because our love for them remains as does their love for us both. 

As you can see, I have a lot to say because I miss talking to someone...if you ever just want to chatter away...I'm here.

Love 
Wendy