I always think now that i will never feek the best feeling in the world..my boys being born..i am constantly feeling the pain of getting the news that my sister died...i cant get over it its been 5 months and i remeber and feel the same feeling i got when i got the news...like my breathe was taken away my heart my sun..i dont know why..she was my best  friend but i would think that this feeling would come if one of my sons died not my sister...seems nothing is happy anymore nothing is worth anything to me anymore..just want to move on...and i now thats selfish but i can see now that its affecting my oldest son

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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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