The Daily Struggle

I know that they say it gets worse before it gets better and I am experiencing that to the fullest. I find that sleeping is one of the battles I face. I cry and the pain is unbearable at night laying in the bed that we shared for four years. I feel alone although I have friends trying to hold me up but it is hard for them when I have no will to even stand. I am struggling at work because of the exhaustion of no sleep and the struggle I am having to even think about the daily responsibilities that I need to accomplish each day and I know that it will bite me in the butt in the long run but I cannot get myself out this rut. I am going to therapy with suggestions of journalism, exercise, and volunteer work as the first step of being able to live my life without him. I miss him so much and feel lost in this world without him. I have a hard time even feeling pleasure from the day to day activities. I am not sure how to heal when the wound I have is so deep.

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Comment by julia mitchell martin on September 8, 2014 at 11:54pm

i know how you feel. i just want to lie in bed and cry. every time i mow my lawn i mow right over the spot he dropped dead of a heart attack. so in riding my troybuilt crying like a lunatic. in 2 days it will be a month. but it feels like years since i laughed

Comment by dream moon JO B on September 8, 2014 at 4:06pm

zell im f@@@@@@t off bean told 2 get over ot or its easy 

its blody not

1s it say it hav nevr lost any 1

sorry fr foul mothd rant i usd

Comment by dream moon JO B on September 8, 2014 at 4:05pm

iiv lost so mush famly frinds nboz so on

lst loss wz in july 2014 so im bk 2 bean numb again mad so on

i dont thnk it will evr get beter pain is still hear

i play on lin slingo wth a few foul moth rants at it

i us 2 do art til i got wong fr dong it it or tking pics i gt wong dont tk pics dont do ths 

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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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