this pain will never end, I cry so much, I hurt so bad. I told my husband tonight to let me go. I just cant keep hurting so much.  I want to be with my son, and I know shawn needs me to. all these pills im on do nothing,  my life is just tears, pain, sadness. im ready to go, I want to go.  dear god let me be with my son, stop this hell I live in please. im so lonely please 

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Comment by Troy Willis on January 16, 2016 at 2:00am

I loss my brother and he was like my twin. We had plans and he played a critical part in my life so loosing him so unexpectedly really broke the person I was. I understand the pain because I can barely breath most days and can't stop crying. I read your some of your post and my heart hurts for you. I feel like Im sinking most days and just trying to get the day over. My brother was my life and now it feels so empty nothing else matters. I do understand you pain and I believe there may be a way to help comfort you in your loss. Im taking a iboga experience to help me deal with my hurt and I think maybe some research in this matter could be very useful to you. Im going to have a professional Sharman facilitate mine. Please consider just reading about experiences people have had. This is not a crazy thing nor is it a fake. I have meet people that have took the journey and I feel its worth some relief to my insanity. I will pray for you and your family. I truly understand what you are feeling. I just loss my brother a few months ago and Christmas almost destroyed me. So please know that there is someone out there that understand how you feel. Please feel free to comment back if you would like to talk sometime. Im new to this site because I don't know what to do about how I feel.

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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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