I Have learned ,to my own detriment, to hold in my emotions until the most inopportune time. This started when i was very young, i had certain family members who always told me to keep my mouth shut, and that crying was showing weakness. the same ones who told me that when i was five are the same ones who told me the same things when my mom and sister died. they say old habits die hard, well this bitch is taking it's sweet time. My whole life i have had anxiety and have always been worried about what people think of me etc etc. now i feel as if i am inflicting that on myself. i feel so guilty for being the only person in my little family who is left, i miss them so terribly i feel like i don't deserve happiness if i don't somehow get things accomplished quickly. i think i am depressed but i'm afraid to go to a doctor and have him commit me or something. my crazy mood swings and angry attitude are causing arguments between my husband and i . he has been with me through everything but i think he is coming to a breaking point with my constant anger and lashing out. i am exhausted but i just can't stop.

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Comment by Money Jensen on February 5, 2010 at 3:02pm
thanks charlotte and courtney i have been on the hunt for a doctor all week hopefully this works i appreciate the support.
Comment by Charlotte on February 5, 2010 at 12:09pm
Take a deep breath, call your doctor and get some help through medication or a good counselor and expect good things to happen in your life. You can stop the worry bug from inflicting you...just say "stop" and mean it and think of something you like to do or imagine a place that brings you comfort such as the beach. Take back your life and enjoy it. Good luck and just know you are not alone...this is a great site.
Comment by Courtney Rice on February 1, 2010 at 9:20pm
If it weren't for my Prozac and Wellbutrin I might have checked out after losing Michael. Please get to a Dr. and get something to help you. They won't commit you or anything. When my husband was alive, and before I had Prozac, I was driving him crazy. He told the Dr. to give me something to literally save our marriage. And they did, thank goodness.

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