His memorial was on the 15th. There were over 200 people there to help celebrate his life. I saw all his high school friends, church friends, family members, even our tattooed biker group of friends. There were punk kids, preppy people, goths... We used to joke about how eclectic our group of friends was.
I tried so hard not to lose it. But when our family friend sang http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xwzItqYmII , I started to sob. I know Matt is in heaven, but the pain of being left here is almost too much to bear.
I thought the funeral would bring a peace, a sort of healing. All it has done as made me acutely aware of how much I miss him. I can hardly function. My dad keeps asking me how many shifts I'm going to work this week. I don't even know if I'm capable of going back to work now.

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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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