Nine years ago the clock stopped. The sun quit shining. The world stopped turning. How could it be nine years ago when it seems like yesterday? I can still see her lying on the ground, people so many people working on her. Then nothing. They said she was gone. Gone where I thought. I held her in my arms, screaming “my baby, my baby” over and over in my mind, in the air. God how could you take her? She wasn’t done. She had so much more work to do here. I need her. We need her. Am I having a heart attack? My heart hurts. To this day it still hurts. Now I know it will always hurt. Today is Angel day. I miss her laughter, her smile. I want one more day. One more hug. One more I love you. I want my daughter. Guess it doesn’t matter what I want does it? Now today we got a call. My brother-in-law is dying in the hospital. It's just a matter of time. Could be hours or it could be days. My poor sister. I have a suitcase packed. I will be staying with her up at the hospital, I leave soon. He is to young to die. What am I saying, so was Irene. Why God, why? He is in a Coma. Can he hear us? Does he know we are there? Is he in pain? So many questions and no answers. Never any answers. Life is hell.

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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
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