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After Death Communication
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
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Comment by Laura Villarreal on October 5, 2009 at 9:22am
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Vivian, after I added my comment I then went to your page to see if I could find a connection and your husband's name jumped off the page...Angel. These past few months have been agonizing and painful for me but I have told my family and closest friends that Angela now has a new job title...just drop the "a" at the end of her name...you get Angel! Like your husband my daughter was also an organ donor...
Some things are coincidental but I truly believe these are spiritual moments we are sharing with our loved ones who have physically left this earth!
Hugs to you,
Laura
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Comment by Vivian Henriquez on October 5, 2009 at 12:07am
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Laura, you may be right, it could be possible that your daughter was delivering the message, because before I drifted to sleep I followed the advice above and asked for a sign that my husband still exists, and a funny thing his name is Angel. It also goes to show you that there are signs that we may receive a sign and not realize it. Although it has been a little over 3 1/2 years since his passing and some days I still find it difficult to get out of bed. But experiences like this is what gives me hope. Thank you
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Vivian, thank you for your kind thoughts and words; and I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. Words just can't convey the heartfelt pain and sorrow we feel everyday but somehow we manage to put one foot in front of the other and slowly move forward. Could it possibly be your husband was saying hello to you through my daughter? It would be just like my daughter to help others...she cared so much about the well being of those around her! And thank you for taking the time to share your experience with me. While we may be strangers we share the very strong bond of grief...as do the other members of this website.
Take care and stay in touch!
Laura
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Hello Laura, I read your story early this morning and was touched, I just came in from washing my cars and had the radio playing and just as I went to turn the radio off the song "Angie" began to play and I immediately thought of you and your daughter Angela and I too sat in the driveway and listened to the entire song. I wanted to write to let you know because it felt as if she was saying hello to you. I have had such feelings about my husband and don't always tell others because they may think I am just imagining because I miss him so much. But after reading the article above know that these precious little signs are OUR loved ones letting us know they are still watching over us.
XOXO, Vivian
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After my husband passed I bought many books on ADC in hopes that I could open any possible communication with my husband. I have had many dreams in which I wake and have this strong sense of his presence. My most memorable experience was the first Valentines Day after his passing. I was sad that he was not here with me and while sitting with my daughters my 2 1/2 year old grandson (who did not know how to read at the time) open up my planner looked me in my eyes, and looked down at a piece of paper then said I love you. My daughter asked him what he had said and he turned the paper around and showed her a note my husband had wrote for me months before. This was a simple note that he had taped to the television one morning before work, which said "I love you Viv." I had not shown or even told anyone about the note and had put it in my planner to look at any time I missed him.
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Thank you, Diana. It seemed so surreal at the time and yet I knew it was her! I have had one other communication from her...a few days ago (Tuesday) I needed to run a couple of errands but I've been okay with taking my car so I got dressed and left the house. I tend to stay close to home because I have been having anxiety/panic attacks and on the way home I could feel my anxiety starting to increase. I was listening to my Fergie CD (we both loved Fergie) and I told Angela to please help get me through this attack, that I was switching over to the radio. Well, "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" was playing and I told her "hey kiddo, you know I hate Diana Ross" so please send me something I could understand! Less than a quarter mile from home I made one last stop at the convenience store for some bottled water. I got back in the car, headed toward home and you guessed it, "Angie" started to play on the radio. I started crying but made it safely home and sat in the driveway until the song ended. Just as I reached for the key "Tears of a Clown" came on! I then started laughing through my tears because again, this had Angela written all over it!
I really don't "look" for communications but what are the chances the song "Angie" would be played when I was no more than 3 minutes from home and only after I had asked for her help?
We were very close and had a wonderful relationship. She was not perfect but she was the perfect daughter!
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Comment by Diana, Grief Recovery Coach on July 15, 2009 at 3:50pm
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Wow, what an awesome story, Laura.
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My daughter was killed on May 25 of this year in Alaska, her home. I was not with her, not even in the same city as our hometown is in Texas. We were very close. Her hometown "Celebration of Live Without End Service" was to be held on June 7 and was being coordinated by family and friends...I just could not find the energy to help.
On June 4 I woke up and decided I needed to get moving and help with the service. I walked out of the house but decided I could not take my car. My daughter loved my car and when she came to visit we kissed and hugged then she was out the door! I asked my husband for his car keys. My husband drives a big old 98 caddy with only a radio and cassette player. He leaves the radio set on his favorite Tejano station. Not that morning. As I turned the key the radio came on...an oldies station. The song playing was "Angie" (my daughter's name is Angela). My first reaction was, oh God...I gathered my wits about me and when the song was over I backed out of the driveway. The next song was "All By Myself" (she was my only child and I had repeatedly been telling her she left me alone). The final song was "You've Made Me So Very Happy". In her obituary I had written how blessed I was for the years she was with me.
If I had taken my car she could not have "spoken" to me because 99.9% of the time I listen to my CDs and she knew that! Music was one of our common interests.
It seemed that when I stopped looking for a sign from her I was more open to a message from her. Never give of hope of a message!
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Comment by Gina Stroup on July 2, 2009 at 11:22pm
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I have some pictures in my room and yesterday I noticed the footprints in the sand and a fathers day shirt my husband never got to wear was moved and picture was upside down, I thought this was a little odd. I wondered why this stuff was on the window ledge for a year and a half and never once was moved. All the other stuff was in its place except for the shirt and picture upside down. I am still curious how this happened. I go to sleep every night hoping and praying I will be able to talk to my husband just one more time. Well, who knows how the shirt fell and the picture got turned upside down. The window ledge is above my bed. STRANGE.......
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Comment by Jacob Michael scott McLeod-Steinmetz on July 2, 2009 at 3:14pm
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Dear Diana
I guess i'm one of the "Lucky" ones with having recieved many signs from my son Jacob
when he first left us for a few weeks the door bell would ring ( no one there when I answered) or many times the phone would ring with no one on the other end I would just say "Hi Jake" at my son jonathon's 21st I saw Jacob standing at the gate smiling at me ( this was before the party and I don't drink at all) I have had many "dreams" were he has been there sometimes he has spoken to me ...My son Ryan has a very vivid dream of Jacob not long after he left us :-)
on Father's day our door bell rang with a different ring tone ( our door bell just has a basic ding dong) this time it chimed music :-) made my Husbands day ( freaked out my son's :-) My daughter Jacinta has had many dreams as well ..
My Jacob was such a strong person It doesn't surprise me in the least that he would send us signs
It was 4 years on the 16th June since he passed away from Leukaemia ( AML)
thank you for the artical Love Jacob's mum www.caringbridge.org/me/jacob
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