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After Death Communication
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
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Comment by Sammie on September 23, 2010 at 7:40pm
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I am pleased to have read your post. I have had many experiences that I am not sure if they correlate to my mom. On the other hand, I am a devoted catholic and I believe in many attrributes of the abikity to communicate. It seems that my experiences, as well as my children's can not be purely situational.
I lost my mom in Oct. of lst. yr., I immedialtely had several experiences. I was 6 monthes pregnant at the time, I just lost my dear uncle, and I was completely overwhelmed! I got very sick in Dec. of '09 and my daughter was delivered 11 weeks early at 3 lbs. I experienced terrible health issues, that had nothing to do w/ her delivery. I was in surgery where I rec. 8 pints of blood and several emergency operations where I was in the OR for 5 hrs. That is just a part if my terriable experience.
I longed to feel my mothers touch. I needed my mom severly, my husband is wondeful however a mom is a mom and can not be replaced. I still question all the situations that have happened since her passing. Perhaps if you relpy (if I may) I can touch upon some of them?
I look forward to your response. Have a wonderful evening!
Best regrads,
Sammie
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Comment by T Brenner on September 6, 2010 at 12:19pm
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It had been exactly three weeks since losing my husband. I had felt his presence really strong a couple of weeks ago while visiting a piece of property we owned. Had an experience witha jack rabbit. Well Saturday I felt the need to open the sealed bag with his remains. I had opened the box, but not the bag. That's when I started walking around our yard and scattering ashes in various places. When I got the garden, his favorite spot, We have a lot of sunflowers, etc. There were these two little butterflies kind of fluttering around. I'd thought about what you had written about the butterflies, so I started talking to them and scattering ashes. i continued to walk around, one of them followed me all over, away from the garden. I then layed on the hammock, whcih is something my husband did every night before passing, until he wasn't strong enough to do it anymore. Actually his last burst of energy was that he jumped up and wanted to sit in front of the garden and look at the sunflowers. He commented how pretty they were and went back to bed. So anyways while laying on t hammock, the butterfly just sat on the hammock with me, for quite a while. So I talked to it, was very comforting. Then when I finally went in the house, I didn't really want to wash my hands, to get the ashes off. I was kind of clapping my hands together, and I could smell him so strong. I never knew the ashes would smell like him, just thought they would smell like ashes. His smell was on my hands!..I told my sister and she said, he was there with me! I then scattered some ashes the next evening, in the front yard, they didnot smell like him. Just smelled like ashes, so I guess he was there with me the day before. Of course I was in his favorite spot and at the best time of day, end of a really hot day, as the sun is setting. We we would always lay on thammock together, and that's what we were doing. Awesome!
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Comment by Diana, Grief Recovery Coach on September 3, 2010 at 7:27am
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I'm sitting here crying over all these posts. They've really touched my heart. I'm so glad we have these experiences and it just reinforces the fact there is life after death. I wish my brother would visit again.
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My brother died March 9, 2010. He was a big NASCAR fan. One Sunday a few weeks after he died, I was in bed and had been dozing off and on. The TV was on a channel that plays "whodunit" shows all day. I got up and went in to my office for a little while. When I went back to my bedroom, the TV channel had changed to the NASCAR race. (I live alone) I said out loud, "I can't watch this, Bud, without you here to explain it to me."
Then, my daddy died Friday, May 7, 2010. When my daughter & I got back to my house in the early hours of the next morning, I went to my computer to draft the obituary for the newspaper. In the center of my screen was a moving picture of 3 eagles flying around the sky over a scene with mountains and a lake. My brother loved eagles. My brother's wife had died Dec. 2008. I don't know where the scene came from. For months & months before this my computer randomly rebooted itself once or twice a day. It did not do that from Friday night until Monday night after Daddy's funeral. When I got home Monday night, the eagles were gone.
Just a couple of weeks ago, I woke up a saw an outline of a man's body in an opaque white shadow standing next to my bed. It was too big to be Daddy, but I wasn't sure it was my brother. I called my brother's name and made the mistake of turning on the light. There was nothing there in the light, but I think it actually was my brother. I've said out loud that it's ok with me anytime he wants to visit. I believe that my brother is letting me know that he's okay. His death was unexpected, and he died alone. I didn't get to say good-bye like I did with my sister-in-law and Daddy.
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It has been 16 days since my husband passed. My kids,grandkids all stayed with me before,during and after his passing. After a few days I finally told them all to go home, I needed some alone time. I could feel the anxiety building as they were leaving. I cried, screamed, all that. After about 30 minutes, I had to get out of the house. Had the strongest urge to go up to a piece of property that we have owned for a while. AS I pulled up there was the largest Jack Rabbit I have ever seen. He just stood there, looking at me. It stopped me dead in my tracks, I just stopped the truck and we looked at each other for what seemed like 5 minutes. I thought it was really weird, because usually the rabbits run away, really fast. So I finally parked the truck, and got out. The rabbit was still there, in the same position, on his hind legs,standing up tall. As I got out and walked around the truck to see if he was still there, he was. He then very slowly, hopped around the bush that he was standing next to. Then he just slowly hopped away, but kept watching me. It was like he was trying to tell me something. I then could feel my husband all over the property. It was as if he were there with me, walking around like we always do. He used to go up there and pick up any trash that people would dump. I could actually feel him walking around with his black trash bag, picking up trash. How I wished I had brought a trash bag with me. There is a cement slab, (where a small cabin used to be). We always carried chalk in the truck, so we could write, draw whatever on the slab. My granddaughter loves to draw as children do. So I wrote him a note, told him I loved him forever. got back in the truck and didn't want to leave. I felt like I was leaving him up there. But it was like his presence just covered the entire piece of property, It's 5 acres so that's a huge presence. I have not felt him anywhere else like that. Will be scattering ashes there and many other places we loved to go.
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Comment by Crystal M on August 14, 2010 at 7:00pm
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Every once in a while I smell my Aunt Dell's powder that she used all of the time. I love that smell. It happened more when I was younger, and as I grew up I dismissed it as my imagination, but after reading this I think I believe that she really is reassuring me that she is okay. My niece passed away almost 3 years ago, and the first 3 days I had dreams of her that were so real. It was like she was giving me more time with her. I still have them every once in a while, and I love it. It feels like I am holding her, and I never want to wake up. My sister kept her room the way it was, and there was a little bunny in her crib that talked. When I went in there I was talking to her. The little bunny said I love you. It scared me and I ran out of the room. My sister said that you have to push it for it to talk, and she didn't believe that it happened. I started crying because I thought that maybe Issy actually pushed it so that she could tell me that she loved us, and my sister believed me after another one of her toys started playing music.
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Comment by Tabatha K. on August 12, 2010 at 4:35pm
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I have only had one ADC with my Pop since his death 10/17/2009 . It was on the day of his memorial & the distribution of his ashes. My husband,sister & I were driving to the destination & about a block away from it, we saw this man crouched down with a hat pulled low. He was the same body type, wearing the same clothes that my dad was fond of wearing & was completely alone.My dad was a very solitary man so this was a very familiar & he frequently crouched down JUST like that. This figure did nothing but stay in the crouched position and watch us as we drove by. I thought that maybe I was in too much grief & was hallucinating but my sister saw him as well. I know this had to be Pop watching us & letting us know that it's ok.
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Comment by Jennifer Friedel on August 6, 2010 at 1:14am
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This may sound weird. I have Marks cell phone.I keep it charged. On the banner he has Mark loves Jen. By the way the phone is only5 months old. Every time i'm upset and crying it lights up and I can see were it says Mark loves Jen. I take it has him telling me that he is with me and still loves me.
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My grandmother passed away five years ago and after she passed away I had many signs that she was reaching out to me. All of them concerned butterflies. The first sign was when a butterfly landed on me at our local park while I was thinking about her and a bunch of butterflies were circling above my head. Then it just seemed everywhere I went there were butterflies darting about me. Then one that really got my attention though was when one of my daughters little friends wanted to come over and spend the afternoon at our house, I wanted to make sure he knew which house was ours and he replied "yeah, yours is the one with the butterfly on the door." I just was floored, I immediately went home, looked at my door and sure enough there was a butterfly on my door. The hard part about all this is that my mom and dad just passed away six months ago and I have not received any signs of comfort. I thought for sure I would have because we were so close but it is as if she just took off and really liked where she ended up.
Thanks for letting me comment.
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I have always believed in an afterlife and believed dreams and visitations etc, were real.Then when my father passed away this past May, it made me question my beliefs.I still want to believe and think I do but I am questioning and it doesn't help that no one I know does believe the same things I believe.Anyways, since my dad has passed away I have had a few experiences that I hope are real but I'm not sure.The first was when I was in bed at night.I was not sleeping but was laying in bed in the dark with my eyes closed.All of a sudden I was walking through my parents living room hoping my dad is ok now and wishing he was with us still as I miss him so much.Then I look over and he is sitting at his chair reading his newsapaper in his room,which used to be my bedroom before I moved out.It is open concept to the living room now.He looks up from his paper and looks at me and smiles and says don't worry and don't feel bad.I am right here and I am ok.That was it.I know I wasn't sleeping.I wasn't even thinking of him when this happened.This thought thing just popped into my head and it was nice.This was just a few days after he died.Then a couple weeks after when I was having a REALLY hard time, two nights in a row I had a dream.The first night my dream was more cloudy I wasn't even sure who I was speaking too,I just knew it was a man.I didn't know if it was my father or if I was speaking to God or what but it was a very comforting.The second night I knew it was the same person in the dream, same dream pretty much.Same place,we were in a white room, just my dad and I.White walls,white window frames,no furniture except an old green tabke and white chairs.the floor was brown.I know this sounds very depressing but it wasn't.It was very calming and beautiful.My dad was like he was when he was younger.I dont know what I looked like or what we said but we sat and talked all night long.It seemed like my dream lasted all night.It was hazy though not vibrant like I keep hearing.It was a beautiful hazy though and peaceful.I don't know how else to describe it and I hope these weren't just dreams.I really hope they were real .I haven't had anything else happen but I hope something does as I miss him and love him so much and really want to know he is around us.
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