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After Death Communication
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
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Comment by dream moon JO B on June 19, 2012 at 8:04am
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i had 1 of thm strange dreams we went to sea my dad in the undertakers and in to the chaple of rest room wer he woz me and mum kisit him on the hed thn he woke up and jumpet out of the cofen mum screamed and i woz just like a shoket zobie mind u it woz the kind of thng he wood of dun allways playing jokes on us or tell us joks
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Comment by Kim Phillips on June 19, 2012 at 6:41am
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cat,
I understand what you are going through. My loved one passed a little over a month ago and I feel nothing from her.
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Comment by Cat on June 19, 2012 at 2:43am
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So is that what it usually its? that when you are actively grieving you block the loved one that passed away so that is why you can't see or feel his/her presence? Because I begged my dad to give me a sign that he was okay (he passed last week) but I felt nothing. My grief is devastating and tearing me apart. Once I overcome my grief and finally let go of my dad I may someday hear from him? I hope to God it's true because the thought of not being able to see any signs of his presence really upsets me. I desperately want to see him again when my time comes.
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it happend agane wen we went to the semetry but this time i used 4 ballons 1 said happy fathers day dad and the other 3 wer leters the 1st1 i tost woz a sosage ballon the 2 ballon the green 1 didnt burst it the other 2 i tost in the air burts in the secnd of eash other but the green 1 went to 10 hed stone even my mums and uncles and sisters skool teacher then it jumpet and burst if i didn no i say ot woz my dad sayin thnks for the leters on the ballons ill try it agane next time we go up i no u can do it any wer any lake beach river but 3 balons to burst and the other 1 the green 1 travling to 10 hed stones then bursting a bit strange i no
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Kim, even Allison Dubois, the famous psychic, said it was nine or ten months before her dad made contact with her, because she was too close to her dad and her grief was blocking him. It doesn't mean it won't happen for you. And, if it doesn't happen, it doesn't mean your loved one is not there. I think some people are more open than others. I'm a very creative, artistic right brained person who was raised in the Appalachian Mountains where I was taught ADE's were normal - psychic experiences overall were normal. I think those things have given me the blessing from God of being able to receive some messages. I think left brained analytical people sometimes have a harder time. I think people who are grieving very hard sometimes have a harder time. I think people who are in a lot of pain or other strong emotions might have a harder time. But, I also know how you feel. My dad has been gone for a little over a year, and he is contacting me less and less, and I miss him and am now worried about him and asking myself where is he now that he can't contact me as often. But, that may return as I've been having a lot more dreams about my mom lately, and she died before my dad. The other night I was so deep in a dream that I couldn't remember it, but as I was waking up I realized that I was talking to my mom and I had her face right in front of me as I told her why I had to go and then woke up. Had I not woke up at that moment, I would not have been aware of that encounter. So, maybe some things are happening that you haven't recognized yet as well.
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I wish I was getting the signs everyone else is receiving. I feel nothingness.
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Dacha, thank you for writing. I think something in our spirit tells us when it is from our loved ones. We know. For example: right after my dad died, I came out of the store and there was a huge double rainbow. Everyone else saw it, but something in my heart told me it was from my dad to comfort me and let me know he was alright. Well, even though everyone in my city saw it, it had significance for me, because when my mom died there was a double rainbow outside her window and when my dad almost died 6 months before there was a double rainbow outside his window. Then, when he dies, I get a double rainbow again. Plus, the double rainbow followed my car. And, when I called my niece in another city to tell her the rainbow was following my car, she told me there was a double rainbow in her parking lot in another city that had been there most of the day. All of my neighbors were excited about the double rainbow and all of her neighbors were excited about the double rainbow, but I just know somehow that it was from my dad. On a note more similar to what you went through, for a while after my dad died I kept finding dollar bills. I worked a flea market booth with my dad, and we always split up the money at the end of the day, and it was usually mostly dollar bills cuz many of our items were one dollar each. Also, I know he always worried about me not having enough money when I was out traveling by myself. So, I kept stepping out of my car (the SUV we carried our flea market stuff in) and finding a dollar on the ground. I put them all in the glove box between the seats, and never touched it. Now that my dad is gone, no one else rides in my car with me. And, I always lock my car and no one has broken into it. But, I put those dollars in there with the intent of never spending them as I saw them as a gift from my Dad. Once a homeless lady asked for money and I dug change and a couple of dollar bills out of my wallet, because I could not give my dad's dollar bills away - and they were in there then as I checked. A couple of weeks later, I decided to spend them, and when I opened up the glove box with the intent of spending them, they were gone. And, they have never returned.
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i fink u r rite storyas abot thm ballons poping it woz a mesage conecet to tht dream i had abot my dad the other day wen he said i miss u all wen we go up agan ill wite another leter on sum ballons and sea if it hapens agan even this man warking his dog jumped my dad wud make you jump for a joke sum times it cud be him still playing joke on us from heven he wood say iv bean 1s im not going agane after his heart atack yrs ago and he used to say wen i do go ill wate out side the gates and wate for yus to come then we will go in he woz so funny well you no tht
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Kim - I think maybe some change happens when we pass over that makes us more gentle on the other side. I think this, because when my dad was dying, I had a moment when I had what the chaplain at the hospital called the Damascus Road experience. I started getting messages. One example: a doctor told me there was nothing they could do for one thing that happened to my dad. That night, I was jolted out of my sleep and literally heard a voice say, "Don't be sad, child. An answer is coming in the morning." At 10:00 the next morning, my phone rang. It was the doctor telling me they had been wrong and there was something they could do. Actually, my dad was getting better for a while after that, but he went to an abusive and neglectful nursing home that did not follow the doctors orders as well as abusing him, so he died any way even though he was improving. That nursing home has since been closed by the state on March 1 of this year. But, when I was having that experience of getting messages, I felt so much peace. It latest about three days, and I got more than one message during that time. Such peace it was amazing. When it started to go away, I tried to hold onto it, but I couldn't stop it from going. It felt icky when it went away even though this is the world I live in every day and it usually doesn't feel icky. But, for a few days after when I was comparing this world to what I felt during those days of peacefulness, this felt icky here. And, you may think this is nuts, but I almost drove off a cliff one day. It was my fault. I was being stupid. My neighbor's dog was lost, and I saw a dead dog laying in the road that I thought was her dog. I looked back to see if it was her dog, and I looked too long. I almost drove off a cliff not too far from my house, but before I hit the guardrail, I felt hands on top of my hands and my car was jerked back onto the street. During the time that was happening, I felt a peace like nothing I've ever experienced before. In both cases, I didn't want that feeling of peace to leave, but it did. Maybe there really is a time for us to die - an our time. Maybe it is pre-decided before we are born. Maybe it is when we reach a point in our spirit that maybe we aren't even consciously aware of. I don't know. But, I guess the day I almost drove off that cliff was not my time to die, because that day I was saved, and i am grateful for that due to me needing to still be here to help my dad. But, my mom was not saved. And, my dad was not saved. So, I don't know the answers. These are only my speculations. And, if there is such peace over there, why is there such hatred and ugliness here. It is all so confusing. I went to a Unity Church for a while. I could not believe very much that they believed, but one thing someone said rang true to me. It was right after my mom died her horribly painful death, and she said, "I believe earth is hell, so we do our time here and then we go to heaven." I'm not saying she is right, but I can sure understand how after experiencing some of the hatefulness and suffering on this planet that people can come to believe that.
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I understood everything you said. You are not a lunitic. as CS Lewis said, You know how people tell you that "she is happy now" "She is at peace" "She is in God's hands" Well wasn't she in God's hands all the time, and I have seen what they did to her here. Do they suddenly become gentler to us the moment we are out of the body? And if so, why? If God's goodness is inconsistent with hurting us, then either God is not good or there is no God: for in the only life we know He/she hurts us beyond our worst fears and beyond all we can imagine. If it is consistent with hurting us, the He/she may hurt us after death as unendurably as before it.
Didn't God say ask and you shall receive? Her and I asked and asked and asked for a miracle and well yes what was received was death. I believed, I had faith, I had hope. I am angry with God right now. I hope that one day, my anger will cease and I can let God in again. I asked for God to to help me. I asked God to forgive me. I asked God in my heart. I asked God to love me and embrace me. What do I get? Nothing. Total emptyness. Any way, thank you for keeping me in your prayers. You are a very wonderful person. blessings and hugs
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