~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim

co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books

Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.

Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!

We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.

Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:

Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.

Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.

Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.

Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.

Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.

Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.

Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.

ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.

Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.

Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.

Telephone Calls:
These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.

Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."

Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.

According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:

"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...

Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...

Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...

I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."

You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.

Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.

Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.

Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.

Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.

Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.

For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."

Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.

Webmaster: Will Guggenheim

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Tags: ADC, after, communication, death

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Comment by dream moon JO B on September 17, 2012 at 4:03pm

the door nocket a few tims today and wen i got ther nobody woz ther i thnk my dads playing pranks on us from hevan abuv and we put pens down and thy turnd up else wer i no my dad woz a joker he must be still playing jokes on us like he all ways did like he new i woz scared of spyders and showed me this fake spyder i screamed that loud he cudnt stop lafing i wish he woz still hear to do that even tho im terfied of spyders even the tv has bean flashimg on and off the sky box is ok even on hear like his trying to send me a email i no i told the funnrell directer who cum to the house to sort his funrall out i hope he send me a email on his old lap tap that died a few days before he did i thnk i got sin on 1 of his favret tv shows  out now to buy on dvd box set and iv had a few more if only he woz still hear i wood buy him thm dvds or pens of his favret tv shows 

Comment by dream moon JO B on September 11, 2012 at 8:23am

i woz abot to cross the rd yesterday and a speading bus cum speeding thru a red lite but for sum strange reson sum thng held me bac if it hadent i wud of bean hit by that bus either killed or sum thng worse i dont no sum 1 said it cud be my dad bean my gurdin angel 

Comment by dream moon JO B on September 9, 2012 at 2:55pm

im sory to hear abot yore bad look storyas 

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on September 9, 2012 at 1:24pm

Hi everyone.  I have not been on for a few weeks, because I've had several trials going on in my life.  One is that my husband has been sick off and on - an infection and his blood sugar both being way out of control.  For a short time, we got his blood sugar under control on insulin and two other medications, but today it is very high again.  I am scared for him.  I don't know if I can stand loosing any one else, and I am very scared.  Please don't give me any advice or tell me any diabetic stories as I can't handle that right now, but if YOU ALL CAN PLEASE PRAY FOR HIM I WILL BE MOST GRATEFUL.  THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR PRAYERS.

I read all of you posts, and I will say that I a religious but also consider myself spiritual.  My religion is Christianity, and Jesus told us to live by the spirit of the law instead of the letter of the law.  So, a religious person should also be a spiritual person.  In 1 Corinthians 13 in the bible it says that now we are looking through a glass darkly but when we get there we will really know.  So, I assume if something happens that might not be exactly the way I understand it from the bible that maybe this is due to me looking through the glass darkly.  In Acts Chapter 2 it says there will be gifts of the spirit also, so maybe when we have these experiences it is one of the gifts of the spirit such as prophecy or something like that.  So, I don't judge it but try to understand it.  I've had a lot of things happen that I truly believe are my dad (or God for my dad) letting me know that my dad is okay.  And, Mark, I know what you mean - my dad kept making my phone ring starting at 4:25 int he morning when he died 24 hours after he died.  When I pick up the phone, no one is there.  When I check my call log, it does not show up on my log.  One time last week it happened, and I didn't answer.  There was about 1 second of what sounded like it might be music, and then it stopped.  Snopes (who are a site known from solid research), but up this article about a man calling his loved ones on the cell phone right after his death:  http://www.snopes.com/horrors/ghosts/deadcall.asp .  So, something is happening, but we are now seeing it through a glass darkly.

For the first few months my dad called me, I was so elated to hear from him.  But, then for reasons unknown to me, I started to get scared after a while.  One night he called me early in the morning hours, and I answered the phone thinking that no matter what he had to say that I wanted to hear from him, so I picked it up, but that time I was scared.  He stopped calling so much after that.  I think he knew i was getting a bit scared and didn't want to scare me.  But, I love him and he is always welcome to call.  I'll deal with myself.

I'm sorry your mom was crying or distressed when she first came to you.  If that would have happened with either of my parents, I would have been freaked out too - worried about them.  But, my guess is that she was only sad to be parted from you, especially since she came back later not distressed.  I'm an emotional person in life, so I can imagine crying when I come back to visit whoever I leave behind when it is my time.  I think spirits probably have different personalities like we do.  Or, maybe she was confused by what happened to her.  As I said, the bible says there are gifts of the spirit, and someone with a gift of the spirit once told me after my nephew died violently that he'd had a hard time adjusting to going over, but after he adjusted he was okay.  The same thing happened with my dad, someone with a gift of the spirit told me that his fear gave him a hard transition but he was okay now.  So, maybe the time right after they move over they have an adjustment period and if they had a lot of suffering or fear maybe they get a little distressed until they figure out what is going on and then they go into the place of peace.  I don't know why she was distressed.  These are only my guesses.  But, I do believe that she is okay.  You might want to send an email to the lady who moderates this group to see if she has any better insights.  I just know I felt very drawn to talk to you, because after my mom and dad both passed, all I could ask myself is if they were okay, so I don't want you to get too focused on that question since she came to you once distressed.  Just keep remembering that she came to you another time when she was not distressed.

God Bless You All.

Comment by Mark on September 2, 2012 at 3:12am

This last week I've experienced 3 very strange things.  One morning laying in bed still half asleep I clearly heard my moms voice calling me but it sounded as if she were crying.  I actually said out loud with my eyes closed.. What?  and the whole day I felt very uncomfortable because her voice was distressful.  I am never sure if this stuff means anything but I did quietly ask my mom if she could hear me not to call out my name in such a sad voice as it upsets me.  Sure enough two days later in bed early in the morning it happened again but it was just moms voice.  No stress added to the voice.  It made the nightmares ease up a little but I also asked after that if she wants to say something to me could she spell it out because this is sorta creeping me out.  I even ( don't laugh ) forced the situation by saying if it's really you mom and not in my head then you'll give me a direct response to my latest request by midnight that night.  Around 8 that evening I was looking for something and decided to check in a drawer of "mom stuff" that I put in there and said I'd go through it later.  What I was looking for had nothing to do with her but figured I'd push all the mom stuff in the drawer aside while I rummaged for what I was looking for.  Low and behold there is a paper folded up.  I open it and it's a poem from a mother to her son and how blessed she feels to be his mother and how she will always be with him in life and death.  I audibly said out loud.. OH MY GOD.  I have no doubt that was from my mom.

Comment by Kim Phillips on September 1, 2012 at 6:27pm

First of all I am not a religious person but I am very spiritual.  I have been reading and reading and reading b/c I have not felt my loved one.  No communication at all.  I couldn't figure out why b/c I know she would have contacted me if she could.  In all my readings, I went back to the bible (read the catholic version, jewish version, jehovah witness version, etc).  What the bibles say is that when we die we go back to the earth from which we came (ashes to ashes dust to dust- we know nothing).  The new testament says that we are in a state of sleep until the messiah comes then we shall all be awaken.   This hit me so hard.  I cried and cried and cried.  But in the same token, I understand why she has not contacted me or her son.  I understand why I don't feel her presence and in a way it is very comforting.  I know that when I pass, one day her and I will be together again during the resurrection. 

Comment by Kali Grainger on September 1, 2012 at 2:25pm

I have been reading a lot of books about people who have died, gone to Heaven and then come back... They give me some reassurance that I will be with my fiance again when it's my time but all of these books have been written by religious people (ministers, pastors, etc.) Does anyone have any suggestions of books that were written by people who may have not been so religious? I was raised Catholic but I don't go to church anymore unless it's for baptisms, weddings, etc.  Chris was baptized but was not a religious person. I just have so many questions regarding the afterlife.

Comment by sandee love on August 28, 2012 at 11:42pm

hi all.  its been about 6 months since my mom went to heaven & i still miss her desperately.  i read about signs that our loved ones give us to let us know they're ok.  i think my sign is white butterflies which i notice whenever i am outside & feeling the tremendous loss of my dear mom.  but, as usual, i write it off as a coincidence.  im wondering, what has happened to me & my belief system....... 

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on August 28, 2012 at 4:04pm

She probably should have but maybe she didn't want all that publicity.  Having that kind of publicity can be awfully hard on a person and can sometimes change them in ways they don't want to change.

Comment by dream moon JO B on August 28, 2012 at 3:58pm

or she woz amazing storyas it pridicting thngs storyas she shud of wote books and had her tv show 

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