~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim

co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books

Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.

Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!

We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.

Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:

Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.

Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.

Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.

Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.

Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.

Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.

Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.

ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.

Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.

Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.

Telephone Calls:
These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.

Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."

Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.

According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:

"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...

Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...

Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...

I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."

You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.

Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.

Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.

Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.

Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.

Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.

For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."

Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.

Webmaster: Will Guggenheim

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Tags: ADC, after, communication, death

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Comment by dream moon JO B on November 22, 2013 at 3:25pm

i no wen my nanna /gran i sme tms smell rum or brandyy i no i dnt drink stuff but she did she cud drnk it strate she cnt i no i can nock bear bk or win bk but not tgethr i no on my dads sde its alwayz bean a jk we can drink a bar tp dry

Comment by dream moon JO B on November 15, 2013 at 3:37pm

Comment by dream moon JO B on November 4, 2013 at 3:32pm

i gort ths on camra wn me mum wear gong thru grav yrd aftr a funrell we cut thu thr we did i cort ths

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on November 2, 2013 at 12:07am

Violet, me and my dad were really close, and I felt him around like that all the time for about a year or so after he died.  Now, he still comes around, but only sometimes.  But, for about a year I almost felt like I was only halfway here myself he stayed so close to me.  I don't know if he was waiting for me or if your husband is waiting for you, but it sure was nice to have him so close.  That is the first time that has ever happened to me where I felt someone that close for so long.  It is a good feeling.

l - I've had dreams like that with my Mom.  I remember one we actually even made plans to go out together on Saturday like we always did on Saturday, and then I woke up all excited that we were going out together again and then I just started crying.  That hurt as bad as loosing her the first time.  I felt like I lost her again.  It sounds like you are handling it better than I did.  I didn't want to let go when I came back, and I got sad instead of feeling uplifted by it like you did.  Maybe I'm selfish - I just didn't want to be away from her again.

Comment by l on October 30, 2013 at 2:36am

Thank you Gramaokie for your thoughts. It helps and is comforting...

Comment by Violet R Schulert Endres on October 29, 2013 at 10:12pm

Its been 8 months since my husband died.. and I hear from him on  a regular basis,, we comminicate with each other.. alot.. its wonderful.. somebody recently said to me .. maybe he hasnt gone to heaven yet.. maybe he doesnt want to leave you... maybe hes waiting for you....I have to admit I really like that idea......I really like it.. what can I say?.. besides some days I feel him around very strongly..other times..no as much .. but....I really feel we still have a rewlationship..he is still my husband..im still his wife.. that ..hasnt changed and ..I dont plan that it will God please ...

Comment by gramaokie on October 29, 2013 at 8:44pm

I can't explain your dream but I can relate to it.  My grandma's been gone 25 years.  A few months ago the dream was similar to yours.  We were at her house and talked and held hands like we used to.  (My aunt sold the house the week after she died.)  Like you when I awoke, it felt like I had visited her at her home.  While the dream was going on, I was aware that she had died, but was so excited to be with her again.  

Comment by l on October 29, 2013 at 8:23pm

I am writing here after almost two weeks... Three days back, I was missing my Dad sooo much. That night I had a dream where I saw my dad.. unlike the previous dreams.. he was standing in the house we grew up in.. the room did not have the usual furniture that was there when we were growing up.. it had some tables with pc computers...by the way we left that house more than 30 years ago and my dad was not wearing his usual pants that he used to wear at home.. these were a different kind.. as soon as I saw him I was so thrilled I went and hugged him all along in the dream I knew he had passed on but it seemed like he has come back.. called out to my mother that he is back and she also came and hugged him and asked him why he was away for so long and he said I was asleep.. then I woke up.. feeling so happy even though the minute I woke up I knew he was no more but the elated feeling of seeing him was there even when I woke up .. the previous dreams that I had after my dad passed away.. I saw my dad in those dreams but he had not interacted with us in those dreams..this one I got to hug him...any thoughts explanations on this dream would be helpful.. thanks for listening..

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on October 28, 2013 at 10:59pm

I just wanted to add to the post that I just left that this retreat seemed to get me more in touch with my Mom.  I've had a lot of After Death Experiences with my Dad but not so many with my Mom.  This retreat seemed to get me more in touch with her.  It is good to be in touch with both of them.

Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on October 28, 2013 at 10:58pm

Hi everyone.  Sounds like Jo B had an interesting experience with some food.  I hope that is all cleared up now and that the smell is gone.  Oh well - it happens to all of us from time to time.  One time I was working long long hours, and I forgot and left my lunch in the car.  Do you know what mashed potatoes smell like after two days in a hot car - if you don't, you don't want to.  It is one of the worst smells I've ever smelled.  I've left lunch in my car before, but nothing knocked up the smell-o-meter like mashed potatoes did.

Well, I've had some things that I think are After Death Experiences happen recently.  I just went on a retreat.  Someone paid for it for me, because I didn't have enough money.  A couple of days before I left, I felt very strongly that I should get these stuffed bears that my dad had left from his flea market business when he died and take them to the retreat to pay it forward.  So, I asked the moderator how many people were coming, and she said 29.  There were exactly 29 bears left.  And, they were a big hit at the retreat and actually helped some women heal as they snuggled them.  I really felt like my dad was leading me to take them to these women at the retreat, and then when we had exactly the number of bears that there would be women I really felt like my dad wanted me to take them.

A couple of times at the retreat I thought I heard my Mom's voice say my name.  It was said softly, but it sure sounded like my Mom's voice.

And, since I returned, the phone calls that I believe are from my Dad have started again.  I just pray that he is okay and is only calling me to touch base instead of needing something, but it is nice to feel in touch with him again.

Also, at the retreat, we each were told to bring a gift that spoke to use and told us it was time to give it to someone else.  And, we put them under a tree after telling why we gave it away, and we each took the thing that spoke to us.  Well, one lady brought a little frog trinket box that had a poem in it.  The poem is exactly the poem that was on another trinket box my Mom had given me shortly before she passed away.  I felt very strongly that spirit had led her to bring that frog, because my Mom loved frogs and had a bunch of frog stuff and that poem my mom had given me on a trinket box was there.  Plus, my Mom used to always tell me that Frog stood for Fully Rely on God, which is something I've been struggling with.  I think she or spirit were also trying to tell me that if I will rely more on God that my grief and fears will be easier to handle.

I've also had a lot of dreams since the retreat.  I don't remember them much, but I put what I did remember of them on the dream group.

Thank you for listening.

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