Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
2 day i fnd a fw of my dads old cds i did
ydat i fnd a fethr 2 day again i fnd a small fethr on sand befr i put my feet in sea
2 small fethrs in 2 dauys it wz
RENEE I would ask God to take away that odor and give you something to let you know your mom is Ok.... ask Him to do it if He will... when we ask God to do something within His will I don't see how it can be wrong or 'asking for signs' in any bad sense.... that odor would haunt me.. we once had an odor like that in a van we bought and we had the preacher annoint the van with oil and command any spirit not of God to leave and the odor went away.... you could be being tormented by evil spirits who want you to think its your mom... and I think your mom's aroma would be sweet and soothing and reassuring to you .. not troubling... so I would ask God to take care of this for you if He will... I am NO expert, just saying what I feel.. please don't think I know for sure what I'm talking about.. I'm just trying to be helpful... hugs to you... I will ask God to do this too...
Lisa.. one time I was sitting cross legged in front of my stereo [about 20 years ago] shortly after my cousin was killed. I was missing him and listening to the song 'Bridge Over Troubled Waters" and suddenly I felt like he was behind me with his arms hugging me from behind... it felt so wonderful.. another time I was playing my Qchord along with some music on iTunes.. a song I had picked because it made me think of my son who had died.. suddenly I felt as if someone had put their hands on my shoulders from behind.. big strong hands... my son was 21 when he died but was small for his age due to severe physical disabilities he had had from birth.. I felt like it was my son's new heavenly hands that I was feeling on my shoulders... I do believe these things are real... I didn't ask for them to happen, wasn't thinking about them happening.. they just DID... people have tried to discourage me about these things but I refuse to believe they are anything other than reassurances that our loved ones are alive and well, and in some mysterious way still near and watching over us somehow.... I could be wrong, but I don't see any harm in believing these things are from heaven.. maybe from God Himself if its true that we can't communicate with those who have gone on.. or maybe it really is the people we love themselves .. anything is possible with God.. only men limit God..
I lost my beautiful husband on May 17th. The night he died I was laying on the floor crying. I heard a noise and looked up to see a beautiful Luna Moth banging on the window. Then it just settled at the bottom of the window looking in. I chose to believe it was Bryon letting me know he was ok. Then the other night I believe I experienced an ADC during sleep. I dreamed that I was laying on my bed and suddenly felt his presence inside of me. It was the most peaceful wonderful feeling. I have only told my sister because I don't think anyone else would believe me. I want so badly to feel him again.
Jeannette.. some people do go to mediums, but I am a bit afraid of that approach, and so far I haven't had to try to have things happen.. they always surprise me when they do, even though I don't ask ... I do tell God that I welcome them and ONE time I did ask God for a sign.. it was after the light turned on by itself up in our off the grid mountain house.. it was on when we got there after being in town for several days.. battery operated.. I was so over whelmed that I asked God that if it was He or Brandon that turned on the light if He would please do it again.... and the VERY NEXT TIME we went to the house the light was on AGAIN and after that it went off and wouldn't go on again ever... so to be safe [due to my spiritual beliefs] I don't try to contact my son through any other way... but I do believe that our loved ones are with us... my beliefs tell me that my son is with God in heaven, and God is always with me, and so I think that means that my son is always with me too since he is now with God... I don't know if preachers would agree with me on that, but I have had so many indications that my son is alive and well that I don't much care what anybody else thinks.. one preacher told me I was praying to the dead but I told him he was wrong... I do talk to my son .. usually not aloud, but I don't feel its doing anything wrong... also I once smelled roses after my mom died... searched and searched... thought it must be a room freshener .. didn't find anything... as soon as I said .. it must be mom.. the scent went away... sometimes I smell my dad's pipe too... just so many things.. I think they happen to many people who just don't notice them or pass them off as coincidences... sometimes people get told they are hallucinating them... I just choose to let them happen as they may and thank God for every one of them.. if I'm wrong and they aren't all from God or Brandon what's it hurt? and if they ARE from one or both of them [which I believe they are] then it is just AWESOME!
Dolly thank you for sharing. Sometimes I really want to believe because that's what keeps me going and then when I am giving up I get more signs. I smelled my friends cologne while I was just sitting alone in my office. No one else around. I have even felt him hold me at night when I was crying myself to sleep and I was able to sleep after that. I thank my friend after every sign for being around me and sending me the signs. Specially when I am feeling down. His photo album that is on my dresser fell off my dresser for absolutely no reason. Its hard to explain but knowing that he is around me is what gives me strength. Just to know that he is somehow with me. I just wish I could have 100% certainty. Have you thought about a medium at all?
Jeannette.. my son has been gone two years and many things have happened to make me believe he is still 'around' at times..lights going on by themselves in a house I hadn't been in for days.. a toy guitar sounding in his room ... and no guitar in his room that made that sound... sightings of all types of animals and birds that we had never SEEN up on the mountain before.. only heard... owls, hawks, scarlet tanagers, woodpeckers, a mama bear and her THREE cubs.. climbed a tree right by our back door and stayed for awhile ... scent of lilies all over the house where there are no lilies... feeling of his hands on my shoulders when I was playing a song I think he brought to my attention from the radio.. a tree in my yard that seems to 'dance' to the music at times while the other trees around it are nearly still... two sightings of a fire rainbow which I didn't know existed before seeing these two the year after he died... one right over our house... a rainbow over our house when we got back home from where he had died... the last was a week ago when we were playing music and a thunderstorm was brewing.. the song was 'Garden of Souls' by Ryan Steward... I had heard it on the radio and bought it on iTunes and was trying to play it... at the end of the song on the very last note a loud rumble of thunder sounded as if to end the song from heaven... are these signs from my son? from God? I don't know but they make me feel that my son is still alive and active somewhere... at least I hope he is...
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