It has been 42 days since my Terry died Monday, April 6th.

We have already gone through his first Birthday, and the first Mother's Day.

Coming up is the first Father's day and our daughter's first birthday without her Dad, and my first birthday without my Booger, and then what would be our 40th Wedding Anniversary.

I am 60 years old. I met Terry when I was 18. I am too stinkin old to be "starting over".

I went to Church this morning, once again, alone....like everything else I am learning to do alone..

I am reading this and feeling anger. I have problems that I need his advice and decisions on. I have my day that I have no one but the dogs to tell about...

Massive coronary...in the dining room...gone.

I am so d... angry. I want my Terry back. I want my life back.

I am sorry...not sure to who!

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It was not supposed to be like this

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