Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
@Janette my sister in law tells me all the time that my mom visits her but I'm still skeptical. Who knows though . I know that I have had dreams and weird things happen. So anything is possible. :)
So, another thing happened to me yesterday morning I have a picture of me and my son when he was a baby. I keep it on my desk it was there when I went to bed. I woke up came out of my bedroom I kept the door closed that night and almost stepped on the picture it was laying right outside my door. the kids were still asleep. I asked my husband if he saw or put it there he said no. I find this odd. On the frame it says Me and my Mommy! hmmm? oh also my mom bought me this frame :)
Amanda I dream of my mother frequently at first they were bad dreams then they turned into that..She was ok and she didn't die in the end those were worse cause when I woke up it was like losing her all over again..But now my dreams are mostly memories I have of her. That is really awesome about your husband touching your face and giving you a kiss :)
Big hugs to you
Melissa
Hello to All,
This is my first comment on this discussion. I lost my husband on the 28th of April, 2011. I constantly dream with him every other day. Many dreams are about him returning back home, that he did not die and that everything is back to normal how it was before that night he was killed.
For the past week, i have been real sick with the cough and flu. Today, i put my son to sleep for his nap and I layed down in my sofa. I felt asleep pretty quickly. When I felt my husband's hand touching my face and giving me a kiss in my lips. I was sleeping but in my sleep I knew I was here laying down on my couch with my eyes closed. I did not see him. I just felt his hand and his kiss. It was more real than physical life.
I do believe she has come to visit me in my dreams..One night I was laying next to my son Matthew he's 4 and autistic he was very close to my mother..She used to watch me rock him to sleep and sing to him. that night matthew was having issues falling asleep it was very late and I was dozing off but still aware of my surrounding. (my mother used to come to the side of my bed or rub my leg or arm when she was alive) So that night her presence washed over me very strongly I could feel her there..and a warm hand went up one arm and down then it happened to my other arm it felt electric almost like I got shocked and my arm went numb a second but not a bad sensation it was nice it literally felt like she was comforting me..Cause I was very tired and stressed out.. I even called out I feel you mom I feel you.. and she whispered I'm ok I'm ok..I opened my eyes cause I swore she would have been standing there but she wasn't then her presence went away..and that's not the first time thins has happened a week or 2 after she passed. I was walking down the hall at my brothers house. She used to be in the living room..so as I was about to round that corner I swore she would have been standing there..when I came into the room I felt her and this sadness washed over me..not mine but it was hers I burst out in tears and the feeling went away as fast as it came...but it affected me all night. I moved from that house 4 months ago into our own place. A couple of weeks after we moved I was rocking my youngest..and it was late well I glanced over at the recliner she used to sit in when she was over..I had this feeling she was there that washed over me so strongly it took my breath away..She stayed for a few minutes or the feeling stayed I called out are you there mom? and the feeling drifted away. I don't know if these things have ever happened to you but I truly believe my mom was paying me a few visits. I don't mean to type your ear off but I thought you might like to know these things I've experienced.
Hello I read these post..I'm so happy that I'm not the only one experiencing these. I have a few but I will just share one for now..My mom has been gone 7 months on the 7th..I was cleaning out my closet getting rid of somethings..I found an old purse she gave me about 2 yrs ago I haven't used in over a yr..I had it already cleaned out cause I meant to throw it away (it broke) mind you she cleaned it out very well when she gave it to me and I cleaned it all the way out when I put it up. Well when she was still using it she took an earring out of her ear before her wrist surgery and tucked it in the back zipper compartment. and neither one of us saw that earring again. Well I went to go back through the purse just to make sure my husband had not put anything in it when we moved. So I checked all the pockets and got to the back zipper compartment that was completely empty 3 months ago. the earring was in there just sitting right in it. in plain sight. coincidence?? I think not!
My brother had an experience the morning of my father's funeral. My father's wake was Friday night and the funeral on Saturday morning. Friday night, we each brought home flowers from the funeral home. Saturday morning while he was getting ready for the funeral, my brother smelled throughout his house the combination of burning leaves and a barbecue. My father always grilled when we visited and he lived in the county and would burn leaves every Fall. He loved doing both! My brother went outside to see if someone was grilling or burning leaves, and there was no smell outside. Plus it was around 7:30 in the morning which would have been an odd time for someone to be doing either anyway.
Then, on Sunday evening when my brother went to move the vase of flowers from his counter to his window, he noticed a ring on the counter. He tried to find a logical source for the ring, but couldn't. Nothing else on the counter had a similar ring. It was a black circle which, when he went to wipe it away, smudged and smeared. When he ran his finger through it, it had an oily consistency. He said it reminded him of soot. He believes it was probably there since Saturday morning and he just didn't notice it. We think it was my dad's way of letting us know he was okay!
Michael
It seems to be that perhaps the soul is the mind.
We know how the mind directs the organs of the body but do we know how the mind works? Thinking is really a phenomenon..
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