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After Death Communication
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
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Comment by Kali Grainger on August 20, 2012 at 4:55pm
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I feel like I need a guarantee that I will get to be with my fiance again when it is my time.... Can anyone offer any insight into this?
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Comment by dream moon JO B on August 18, 2012 at 3:08pm
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i saw this man who looket like my dad wen i took my mum out for a meal today he woz the sam hite sam build i nealy shouted dad i thnk if he had of spoke to us i wood of fainted or wot ever with shock i no it woz my granmothers anversry this month of her death my dad used to wite them all don so we wonderd foget the anaversy of the family and frends deat and it woz my cuzen and anversy at the biging of this month her litte; girl is doing well now shes 9 now and lost her mum wen she woz 7 i thnk 2 of my dads sisters died the sam month as him but they died over 20 yrs ago to kidny canser and breast canser
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iv got the avater on dvd sum were sean it a logn tim ago i no it woz gooood ill after to try and find it to watch again mamy if i wozent so undidy id proberly find thngs but sean my sister going on like she has o c d evry thnh has to be neat and tidy it puts me off the good thng is wen i do tidy up iv fond mony hiden under my bed or find thngs that i hav lost or thngs iv put don and foget wer iv put thm
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Comment by Storyas Fawnfeather on August 12, 2012 at 10:28pm
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jb - I watch a lot of BBC TV so I know you all weigh in stones, but I have never quite been able to figure out how that works. Just suffice to say that I did not think you looked fat. I thought you were lovely in the picture you shared. But, steroids will really put weight on any one, so you can't blame yourself for gaining weight on steroids. That was one of several factors in me gaining weight. I gained weight so fast on a steroid that I literally put my black dress pants in the laundry after taking them off with them being a little baggy, and two weeks later when I washed them, I had gained so much weight in two weeks that I could only get them half way up my thighs - and I've had a hard time controlling my weight every since. A chiropractor told me I'm having a hard time with weigh still, because the doctor took me off of the steroids quickly instead of weaning me off of them so my adrenal gland was damaged. I'm sorry that the man you fancied ended up being gay. That has happened to several of my girlfriends. It is not mine to judge if someone is gay. I just hope they are happy and then I don't think on it from there. That is between them and God and their families and partners. I think too many Christians spend too much time judging others when they should be looking at their own hearts. To say we are better than someone because they are gay is like praying the Pharisees prayer where the Pharisee thanked God that he was better than others due to him seeing himself as righteous. That does not mean we can't make decisions to discern for our own well being though. There is a difference between judgement and discernment. There was a gay man who fancied me about fifteen years ago before I got married. I knew he had run around to gay bars and been in orgies and had sex with lots of people, so I told him no thank you. I was afraid as much as he had been around that maybe he would give me an STD if I ended up marrying him or something. And, I was also afraid that if we ended up being a couple that he would realize that what we had was just an infatuation and that he really did only like men and would leave me to go back to men. So, I told him no thank you. I did not think it would be a good thing for me to date him. It's the same with with what your dad said. There is a difference between judgement and discernment. Your dad was right not to judge the nurses, but he did have a right to discern that he was not getting the proper care and take whatever steps was needed to make sure he and other patients got good care. I'm just so sorry that your dad went through bad care like my dad did. It is so sad that people can treat other people that way.
Me and my husband watched a movie together tonight. We saw Avatar. Have you seen it yet? It was so good. If you haven't seen it, I recommend it. It is about our culture ruining our earth mother and then trying to go to another planet and steal their planet from them. I had a really powerful message about taking better care of our earth and not being greedy and was a very good movie too. I'm just recommending it cuz I just saw it and still have the jitters from how good it was.
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dont wory abot bean fat on that foto i luv my dad page look how fat i woz i woz abot ovwr 15 stone i thnk at the time i woz on steriods and sinse my dad died im just under 12 stone at 5 ft 3 now im worid abot geting winkels u remidned me of a old a skool freind gay kenny but he like u woz lovely i no u r not gay and nether am i for yrs i fancid him rotten then i relisid id get no wer with him i havent sean him for a long time i just hope his met a nise man i hope i havent put my foot in with u the only drs who care r the older 1s the yunger 1s dont care i no the older nurse care but that last ward my dad died on wer just yung nurses who didnt care bean rasest to the forin nurses espelty to the filapionos and chines i thort that woz arful my dad used to say live and let liv and dont judge people but that day i cudnt help it my dad used to say its wots in side that counts not the out side i hope im not driving u nuts i hav to sea the dr this weak but iv nown him for yrs and his none me sins i woz abot 16 so i trust him and his very obease i wont say his name but his very funny
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and sum thngs u cant get on prescibsions the nhs is free to sea the dr but prescibsions and dental and eye test u hav to pay for but sum thngs u cant get on presicrsion i dont mind my hair short easy to manage pluss wen it woz long lucy used to swing on i no it sonds very funny s he even used to pill my dads comenty nurse hair but she lived her that musg she let her get away with itcoz she loved her to bits and lucy says hi to u
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jb - thank you for saying I look young. I think I look young, because I'm fat. A fat face pushes the wrinkles out. When I loose weight and I don't have fat pushing my skin out to hide the wrinkles, my age will probably show.
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I know what you mean - undertakers seem to care more than doctors. I went to a grief support group just last Sunday where a lady lost her son, and she was devastated. I don't know what kind of health care you have in the UK, but at this point we have health insurance instead of universal health care. This ladies son was electrocuted on the job. His job did not give health insurance, so no doctor wanted to see him. They went from doctor to doctor trying to find an answer. Those who would see him said nothing was wrong and sent him home. The free clinics he stayed on the list for months and they could never get him in. I have a good friend who belongs to the Tea Party over here, and she said she doesn't believe in Obamacare, because the free clinics already do more for the poor than those with insurance. But, I'm a medical massage therapist, and I've had clients I referred to clinics all the time that it took them two or three years to get in. One lady needed immediate surgery to save her life, so I promised her I'd stand by her side and not give up on her till she had the surgery. I spent nine months so stressed I was practically pulling out my hair to find a clinic doctor who would help her. She could have died, and she had a small daughter who needed her. Well, that is the same thing this woman from the grief support group went through. Since he could get no help, he died. The undertaker came to pick up the body, looked at him and said, "I've seen this before. I'm not a doctor and can't diagnose, but he sure looks like people I've seen before with post-electrocution syndrome (or something like that - I might not have remember the name right). Apparently, some of the best specialists for this illness are in my city, but no doctor cared enough to refer him, because he did not have insurance and was not eligible for Medicaid because he needed to keep his car that was worth more than $1,500 to get back and forth to the doctors as he tried to find help, and you can't have more than $1,500 in money or property if you are going to get Medicaid. It is all so sad. Yet, another example of an undertaker caring more than the dozens of doctors this young man (only 36 or 38 - can't remember which one right now) saw. It's so sad. I'm sorry your having problems with eczema on your head. Once it is completely well, I'm sure you can grow your hair out again. I cut mine very short three and a half years ago cuz I was so busy taking care of my dad that I couldn't deal with it, and it's already down to my waist again. Not that it matters cuz 99% of the time I just wear it in a bun, but that is why I like it long. I don't want a short hair cut where i have to stand and primp in front of the mirror every morning. If I have long hair, I can put it in a bun in just a couple of minutes and go about my day.
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you dont look yore age u lok very yung on ther the last foto i took of my dad i cant look at that 1 coz it woz the last foto i took wen i had long hair it wood stick up worse then jedrard now its a number 2 hair cutfor me coz i had a bad case of exsmer on top of my hed so i hav to use this dear shampoo for it it still cums bac now and agane a weak or so wen me and mum went to another funrall a babys funnrall we got to the creamatorim to early and saw 2 funnralls going on 2 lady under takers doing were the wark in front of the herse then gide the family in to the crem i no ther woz a lady under takr who did my cuzen and and she has bean ther for the family 2 even the day of my dads funrall the yung boy who did his made sure we got in the limo ok then boud at the herse and warket in front of the herse till the end of the st then got in the hurse with the pall bures who cary the coffens i keap on saying now if im to ill said me to the funrall home it least u get beter treament
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jb - I think you are right. We pre-planned our funerals, and the people we pre-planned with became our friends between the time of pre-planning and my dad's funeral and then they were there for me after the funeral and still are. They really seem to care. When I euthanized my dad's dog the other day, my friend remarked how much healthier she already looked, because the strain of suffering left her face when she died. And, at the funeral, my dad's face no longer had the strain of suffering and he looked much younger. I found a picture today of me and my dad that I scanned in so I could send it to you on the computer. I'm usually the one with the camera, so there are not many pictures of me. But, a nice Activities lady at the nursing home (the Activities Department people were really nice but the nurses and doctors were awful) took this picture. Please forgive how unkempt I looked. I was so busy taking care of my dad I barely had time to comb my hair and brush my teeth. I often only got a bath a couple of times a week. I must have stunk. I don't know how my dad could stand to be around me so much.
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