Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
~ Joyous Reunions With Deceased Loved Ones ~
©1995; by Bill Guggenheim & Judy Guggenheim
co-authors of Hello From Heaven! published by Bantam Books
Have you been contacted by a loved one who has died? After-death communication (ADC) is probably as old as mankind, but ours is the first complete research study of this field. These spiritual experiences are extremely common, and in many other parts of the world they are discussed openly and freely.
Between 1988 & 1995, we interviewed 2,000 people who live in all fifty American states and the ten Canadian provinces. Ranging in age from children to the elderly, they represent diverse social, educational, economic, occupational, and religious backgrounds. We conservatively estimate that at least 50 million Americans, or 20% of the population, have had one or more ADC experiences – and the actual numbers may be closer to double these figures!
We collected more than 3,300 firsthand accounts of ADCs from people who have been contacted by a deceased family member or friend. These are spontaneous and direct communications that may occur anytime and anywhere, but no third parties such as psychics, mediums, hypnotists, or devices of any kind are involved.
Based upon our research, the following are the twelve most frequent types of after-death communication people report having with their deceased loved ones:
Sensing A Presence: This is the most common form of contact. But many people discount these experiences, thinking, "Oh, I'm just imagining this." It's a distinct feeling that your loved one is nearby, even though he or she can't be seen or heard. Though most often felt during the days and weeks immediately after the death, you may sense his or her presence months and even years later.
Hearing A Voice: Some people state they hear an external voice, the same as when a living person is speaking to them. However, the majority of communications are by telepathy – you hear the voice of your relative or friend in your mind. When you have two-way communication, it is usually by telepathy. In fact, it's possible to have an entire conversation this way.
Feeling A Touch: You may feel your loved one touch you with his or her hand, or place an arm around your shoulders or back, for comfort and reassurance. You may feel a tap, a pat, a caress, a stroke, a kiss, or even a hug. These are all forms of affection, nurturing, and love.
Smelling A Fragrance: You may smell your relative's or friend's favorite cologne, after-shave lotion, or perfume. Other common aromas are: flowers (especially roses), bath powders, tobacco products, favorite foods, and his or her personal scent.
Visual Experiences: There are a wide variety of visual experiences, which we have divided into two broad categories: partial visual and full visual ADCs. Appearances range from "a transparent mist" to "absolutely solid" with many gradations in between. You may see only the head and shoulders of your relative or friend, or someone you love may make a full appearance to you, and you will see the entire body as well, which will appear completely solid. Some visual ADCs occur in the bedroom, next to or at the foot of the bed. Others may happen anywhere – indoors or outdoors – even in a car or aboard a plane. Typically he or she will be expressing love and well-being with a radiant smile. Loved ones virtually always appear healed and whole regardless of their cause of death. Verbal communication may take place, but not always.
Visions: You may see an image of a deceased loved one in a "picture" that is either two-dimensional and flat or three-dimensional like a hologram. It's like seeing a 35 mm slide or a movie suspended in the air. Visions are usually in radiant colors and may be seen externally with your eyes open or internally in your mind. Communication may occur, especially during meditation.
Twilight Experiences: These occur in the alpha state – as you're falling asleep, waking up, meditating, or praying. You may have any or all of the above types of experiences while you are in this state of consciousness.
ADC Experiences While Asleep: Sleep-state ADCs are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than dreams. They are very common. Both one-way and two-way communications are typical. You usually feel your loved one is with you in person – that you're having an actual visit together. These experiences are not jumbled, filled with symbols, or fragmented the way dreams are.
Sleep-state ADCs are similar to those that occur when you are wide awake. Your relative or friend can come to you more easily, however, when you are relaxed, open, and receptive, such as while you are in the alpha state or asleep.
Out-Of-Body ADCs: These may occur while you are asleep or in a meditative state. They are dramatic experiences during which you leave your body and often visit your loved one at the place or level where he or she exists. These are extremely vivid, intense, and real – some say, "more real than physical life." The environments usually contain beautiful flowers and butterflies, colorful bushes and trees, radiant lighting, and other lovely aspects of nature – and are filled with happiness, love, and joy.
Telephone Calls: These ADCs may occur during sleep or when you are wide awake. You will hear a phone ringing, and if you answer it, your loved one will give you a short message. Two-way conversations are possible. His or her voice will usually be clear but may seem far away. If you are awake, you will probably not hear a disconnect sound or a dial tone when the call is completed.
Physical Phenomena: People who are bereaved often report receiving a wide variety of physical signs from their deceased relative or friend, such as: lights or lamps blinking on and off; lights, radios, televisions, stereos, and mechanical objects being turned on; photographs, pictures, and various other items being turned over or moved; and a long list of "things that go bump in the night."
Symbolic ADCs: People frequently ask a Higher Power, the universe, or their deceased loved one for a sign that he or she still exists. Many receive such a sign, though it may take some time to arrive. Occasionally these signs are so subtle they may be missed, or they may be discounted as mere "coincidences." Common signs include: butterflies, rainbows, many species of birds and animals, flowers, and a variety of inanimate objects such as coins and pictures.
According to our research, the purpose of these visits and signs by those who have died is to offer comfort, reassurance, and hope to their parents, spouse, siblings, children, grandchildren, other family members, and friends. They want you to know they're still alive and that you'll be reunited with them when it's your time to leave this physical life on earth – and they'll be there to greet you when you make your transition. Their most frequent messages, expressed verbally or non-verbally, include:
"I'm okay ... I'm fine ... Everything is okay ... Don't worry about me ...
Don't grieve for me ... Please let me go ... I'm happy ... Everything will be all right ...
Go on with your life ... Please forgive ... Thank you ... I'll always be there for you ...
I'm watching over you ... I'll see you again ... I love you ... Good-bye ..."
You may be asked to give a message from your loved one to somebody else. We urge you to write down the message verbatim and to deliver it, if possible, because it may help the recipient far more than you realize.
Nearly all ADCs are positive, joyful, and uplifting encounters that reduce grief, provide lasting comfort and hope, and accelerate emotional and spiritual healing. We encourage you to trust your own experiences and to accept them as being real for you.
Unfortunately, some people react with fear when they have an ADC. This is usually because they are startled by the suddenness of the event, or they may have never heard of one happening to anybody else. Such people may assume they are "losing their mind and going crazy." And others find it difficult to reconcile after-death communications with their philosophical or religious beliefs.
Not all people are contacted by their deceased loved ones. We don't know for certain why some are and some aren't, but it seems that fear, anger, and prolonged heavy grief inhibit the possibility of having an ADC.
Based upon our research, we suggest the following: Ask for a sign that your relative or friend continues to exist. Pray for him or her and others who are affected by the death, including yourself. We recommend that you learn how to meditate, especially if you are currently bereaved or have unresolved grief. Meditation will enable you to relax and soften any fear or anger you may have. It will reduce your depression, improve your ability to eat and sleep, and facilitate your healing process. These deep relaxation exercises will also allow you to unfold your inner, intuitive senses. In fact, you may have an ADC experience while you are meditating.
Our research indicates that after-death communications are a natural and normal part of life. Therefore, we feel ADCs deserve the same public awareness and acceptance that near-death experiences (NDEs) have already received.
For most people, an after-death communication from a deceased family member or friend is valued as a sacred and profound experience that will be cherished for a lifetime. ADC experiences usually expand one's understanding of life and offer a deeper awareness of life after death. They consistently communicate an essential spiritual message: "Life and love are eternal."
Copyright © 1995 - 2009 The ADC Project. All rights reserved.
Webmaster: Will Guggenheim
Comment
No coincidences! I have a white butterfly in my yard everyday since my son passed. It is amazing. Everyday I go outside and one comes and flies around me and sometimes follows me around. I look for him now and say hi honey I miss you to the butterfly! Maybe I'm crazy but some things you just know in your heart. When I am beyond despair, going outside and seeing that free beautiful butterfly makes me feel like he is okay even if I'm not. And that helps.
right now I feel like Im living with dan, even though he isnt here in body..I feel like he is around in spirit.. some people think that means Im not getting on with my life...Im justtalking to him alot and sometimes jearing from him... its wonderful...I miss him so much.
yes i no whot u mean abot musicc marylyn today i woz watchng vintge tv musi chnalle i woz 1 of my dads favrt songs com on imangee by jon lenen it woz it flt lik my dad woz in th room it did
a few tims i thrt iv hrd my dad say my name iv evn jumpt wit shok thngkng it woz him plyng jokes on us lik he alwayz sid wen he woz alibve
i tnk we mite hav a ghost in our hous coz wen we went out y day we lockt th living room door so lucy cud not go on a clicking furnsur or wall paper or vandlizing thngs
wen we got bac th living room door woz open i thnk it must of bean my dad playng troicks on us frm hevens gates
to many wed thngs hav hapend sinse he died u put thngs don thn thy trn up later in aner plase
u can put pens on a tabl thn u dont fnd thm till weaks later
even wen th fone rings som tims u get a mumbo jumbo mesage
or my dads moble fone rings speking abot insurnse my dad did not trust lif insurns even i dont now
its so weid even wen i do him letrs ob ballons let thm go thy alwyz pop i no now its 2 mush of cosrinsdense i do now evn som1 els saed its to mush of corisnde u dont get tht many ballons poping lik i hav bean havng
On May 8th 2013, my beloved mother passed away unexpectedly. We were very close and her sudden loss has left an immeasurable void in me. In life, she had this special energy and since that day she left I feel perhaps she has been making attempts to communicate with me. The first is the most likely to be a coincidence I suppose but how many coincidences does it take to acknowledge that it might just be something else? The first was a blown light bulb. Following that were two separate incidences (in two separate rooms) of an unexplained vibrating noise - neither mine nor my boyfriends phones are set to vibrate, nor did we have any missed calls/texts/notifications that might've triggered a vibration even if they were. At the time, my overwhelming grief caused me to dismiss those without much thought. The next two incidences, however, really caught my attention and left me amazed and scared and feeling like I was losing my mind. After hours of sobbing and writing a short letter to my mom about how much I loved and missed her, I was about to join my boyfriend in bed in another room. My cat and I entered the kitchen and that's when I heard this mechanical type noise....nearly jumped out of my skin, broke out all over in goosebumps. To me, it had sounded like a drill my boyfriend had used a few days prior while installing our A/C - an item I thought was in the living room which I'd have to pass through to get to bed. I was too freaked out so I just waited until my boyfriend got up for work and told him what I had heard. He then told me that the drill was actually in the car so that couldn't be what I heard. Not being able to find the source of and re-create the noise left me unsettled. What was it??!! I had to figure it out or it would drive me insane. The next night I sat in the kitchen and just tried to focus on what it could've been. After a few moments, my eyes settled on something we hadn't used or touched in months sitting on the counter. It was a motion-sensor snack dispenser that my boyfriend's sister had gifted him for Christmas. After all the candy was gone, it simply sat there forgotten. It's not particularly sensitive; you have to have something in front of the sensor (which is on the underside of the unit, below where the candy would come out) for a few seconds before it turns on. It had not gone off by itself before in all the time since Christmas and there was no one/nothing else in the kitchen but me and my cat and we were both nowhere near it when it turned on. I tested it and sure enough that was the noise I'd heard. I was excited and relieved to have solved the mystery. I moved it to the center of the kitchen table and then spoke aloud to my mother. I told her how much I loved and missed her and how I wanted her to be there with me and if she could just say "hi" anytime how much it would mean to me. I started to leave the room and it activated itself again. It was almost on cue, how could that be a coincidence??? It hasn't happened again and the more time that passes the more my mind tries to rationalize it away. But in that moment....it was so comforting and freeing to believe it was her, that she was listening and still loved me from wherever she was and that we could be reunited someday when it's my time. I want so desperately to believe that.
On Saturday, my husband and I got out of our car at a local restaurant near a bookstore. I recalling an unhappy incident that happened at the book store between my son Daniel. Then it happened that I looked up and saw a huge bald eagle. We very very rarely have eagles in this area and it was amazing. It soared for about 5 minutes above us then flew towards the mountain where we have across in honor of my son. As the bird disappeared I began seeing swirling white lights in the sky. I just know it was Daniel letting me know once again that he is with us and that he is soaring and free and that all that we felt guilt for was forgiven. I believe it with all my heart and soul. But God I miss him more and more each second. It is just so painful to be here without him so I cherish these communications. Just wish I could give him a big hug. Peace to everyone.
Hi. I am new to the site. On May 8, 2013 my husband was killed in a work related accident. That day I met with his dad at his house. As we were all standing outside a baby bald eagle kept flying over us. His dad made the comment"That it was Kevin". That night when me and my children returned home from meeting with family our screen door had the lock slightly moved over to where the door would not shut. I was the only one home that day and did not open the door that far. My son looked at me and said that is dad. I said you are right he wants us to know he is with us. The next day I was sitting on the porch talking to my mom and a friend and I heard loud footsteps going through my house. I asked if anyone else heard that? No one did just me. I know when people die suddenly they have a hard time passing over. Later that afternoon I took a walk in the yard and told Kevin I did not want him to go but I knew we would be okay. Since the moment I heard of his death I have had a peace with it. Am I crazy? I just feel he is with me and I know it will be okay. Maybe I am in denial?
kellie , they arre wrong in my opionion, youll be ready when you are ready, and it may take a long time. is going to for me.
I have felt someone pressing down on my shoulders, this happens when I get really upset. I feel like it is my mother pressing on my shoulders. Whenever I would get upset about something that happened at work she would always say " Just be still" so I feel it is her telling me to "Just be still"; meaning wait on the lord.
I miss her so more and more each day!
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