That my Mom has been gone for 1 year, and 23 days. I never imagined that I would lose my Mom at such a young age..well even though I'm 23, I consider that young because I don't feel my age at all! I feel like a little girl without my Mom. Of course I've always felt young since I didn't have much of a childhood and my innocence was taken away from me, but since she has been gone, it has gotten worse! During the day, I seem to do ok, since I'm around Step-Dad's family, but during the night,…

I can't believe that on January 27th, my beautiful mother will have been gone a year! It seems like forever ago since I saw and spoken with her, yet it feels like it just happened! I have been completely numb and dead inside in 2012 and been in a total fog..when will I ever feel alive again? I know I will never be over her but I want acceptance & forgiveness of myself and I don't know how to achieve that!

I contacted a Medium the other day through email. He only wanted the whole name and nothing more, and he gave me so much information and helped me somewhat with 'closure.' What has kept me back, is I didn't know if mom forgave me for the things that I did, and I didn't know if she knew that I loved her! She forgives me and knows that I loved her regardless of the big 'ups and downs' that we had and told me not to beat myself up for the past, we make mistakes and learn from them! I know it…

I don't know if it's normal to be stuck in different stages of grief at the same time or not, but for me, it has been going on for awhile now! I miss my mom so much it hurt, and I'm angry at myself plus the doctors for not doing anything about it! I luckily have never been mad at God, I sometimes get mad that the only person I truly had, was taken away from me but to be directly mad at him, I haven't! There has been talk between some of Mom's 'friends' and all they could talk about, was that…

It's on the 19th and I don't know what to do with myself! I was always guarenteed to spend the day with her. When I was in school, she would let me stay out and she would take off from work. We would go out to eat and then shopping for a bit. When I graduated from High School, it still continued, she took off from work and we would go out to eat then to the tattoo place. I never imagined that last year would be my last birthday with her! I'm contemplating on admitting myself into the…

Ok so here is the thing, when my mom went into a coma on the second day, her dad, sister, brother, and mother was ready to pull the plug and not give her a chance to survive. Since my mom has been gone, I haven't heard from any of them except my grandmother. My point is, is that my stepdad is so mad at her sister(can't stand her) and only her. Now I am mad at all of them but wondering why I get so mad when he talks about her..he says that she got into our business when she shouldn't have,…

It's been almost eight months since my mom has been gone and I'm no where near finding peace within myself, in fact, most days I feel worse. I thought in time, I would be able to cope better, remember the memories, and move forward, but sadly this hasn't been the case. I have hit an emotional block, where nothing can get in and I can't release the pain I feel within. I'm trapped by my own feelings..I've tried to make sense of it but can't! It seems that I'm living on a rollercoaster; I'm up…

I have been watching Criminal Minds and The Big Bang Theory to distract myself because if I don't, I think about my mom 24/7..I think about ending it all, all the time, but some days are worse than others. I know my mom would want me to be happy because that's all she ever wanted but the feeling in my heart and soul is just too great at times. I don't know how to have a life without her!!:'(

Sleep was the only thing that I looked forward to because atleast my mind would stop thinking…

It feels as if Januray 27th was just yesterday, yet seems so long since I have seen my mother. Ever since she had gastric bypass surgery in 2005, she has had nothing but health problems, especially involving her pancreas, but I never knew it was severe. She was a nurse, so I figured if something was terribly wrong, she would let me know. Or maybe I was just in denial, because parents are suppose to be bullet proof, you…