Hi. I wanted to say thanks for the huge comment. You were talking about shutting out the people who hurt me but for me it's not so easy. I'm ready to start new I'm ready to shut my "family" out. I am. But I don't know how. I mean I basically shut out most of my " "family" however there's one person I'm still stuck with and I can't get rid of him (my "father") I've been needing to get away from him leave him never talk to him again and the worst part that really hurts is I know he won't care :/ there's this guy who lives in Ohio that told me I could stay with him but I only know him from the internet and don't wanna live with him but I mean that would be the only way to leave my fd up "family". I mean honestly I'm thinking about moving up there with him cuz I have no more time. I need help and I need help now. But I mean that's the only thing I can do. That's the only thing that could possibly save me. But yet I'm even scared to do that. I'm actually thinking about ect (electric shock treatment) and maybe if I get that I would be alot happier cuz it could help me forget most of the trauma in my life and maybe will help me be less angry with my "family" and it could make it more bearable to be with my family. Idk though. But honestly getting rid of my "fathers" not so easy :/