misty
  • Female
  • Morrow, OH
  • United States
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  • Brenda Ann

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About Me:
I am 31 years old. An only child. a mother of two and have been married for 13 years.
About my Loss:
I lost my father to cancer July 6, 2011. and lost my mother June 19, 2012 from a heart attack. i had to make the decision to take my mother off life support after she suffered brain damage due to loss of oxygen . She had been living with her boyfriend who didn't call for help when she was complaining of chest pains and vomiting bile. he called after she stopped breathing and she was without oxygen for 20-45 minutes before an ambulance came and was able to get her heart beating again. When i drove the five hours to the hospital she had been put on a ventilator and a cooling system to try to cool her body and give her brain a chance to heal . however after many tests and bringing her body back to normal temperature her heart was only functioning at 45%. she began to try and breathe over the vent but her brain had no function otherwise. after testing the doctors wanted to move her to another center but didn't know if shed ever wake up,were doubtful,and said shed have no quality of life if she did. so i made the decision to take her off the vent. she passed an hour and a half later. I knew she didn't ever want to be put in a nursing home or live in a vegitative state. I made the hardest decision ever, but I prayed over it and left it in God's hands. I struggle everyday but am slowly healing.

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At 10:19am on December 27, 2012, Brenda Ann said…

“Do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not gaze about, for I am your God. I will fortify you. I will really help you. I will really keep fast hold of you with my right hand of righteousness.’For I, Jehovah your God, am grasping your right hand, the One saying to you, ‘Do not be afraid. I myself will help you.’” --Isaiah 41: 10 & 13

 

Dear Misty,

    I am so sorry that you were put in that situation. Boyfriend? What was he doing in the 20 minutes she was without oxygen? Why??? YOU can survive without food for weeks. You can live without water for days. But if you hold your breath, severe discomfort sets in after mere seconds. And just four minutes of oxygen deprivation can cause brain damage and death. Oxygen is the prime need of the human body! How is it that he has not been charged with negligent homicide? I love my mom so much that when I read your story this is what I struggled with. I was in your position and she was my mom.

     I can understand why you are struggling with taking her off life support; however, her “boyfriend” is the one that should be feeling guilty!

     My family has suffered over the death of loved ones and has found the Bible a source of comfort. I hope the scripture at the top reminds you that you are not alone in your sorrow and that God cares. Pray for his help.

Brenda

Mawmaw1591@gmail.com

 
 
 

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Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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Oct 10
Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
Sep 26
Kali added a discussion to the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
Sep 26

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