Vivian Henriquez
  • Female
  • La Puente, CA
  • United States
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About Me:
I used to be a very happy woman but since the loss of my husband I have turned into a bitter angry woman. I miss my husband so much and cannot overcome the pain in my heart. He was my soulmate and now it seems impossible to be happy without him.
About my Loss:
My husband passed away January 20, 2006 and I feel like I cannot live without him. Angel experience a seizure in October 2005 and after a MRI we were told he had a large mass in his brain. The doctors told us that it would have to come out and scheduled surgery for the following week. He was notified by his doctor the evening before his scheduled surgery to let him know that the surgery was canceled due to lack of ICU beds due to a trauma that had come in that evening. Surgery was rescheduled and he was told that there would be no harm in postponing because it was not life threatening. His surgery was again scheduled and after 12 in the outpatient he was sent home due to shortage of ICU beds once again. The doctor again said it was not life threatening and he would be notified again to reschedule. Well in January he was admitted to the hospital and went into surgery January 17th. He was in surgery for 9 1/2 hours and we were told he was heavily sedated but fine and they had removed 95% of the tumor. We were allowed to see him but as we were told he was sedated and we left to allow him to rest. Six hours after leaving the hospital I received a call to come back to the hospital because Angel was completely unresponsive and his pupils were fixed and dilated. When I got there I was told (I don't know the actual name of the procedure) but they were going to drill a hole to try to relieve some of the pressure on his brain. And that if that didn't work they were going to try to a medically induced coma to give the brain a chance to reduce the swelling. A few hours later as I walked down the hall on my way to his room I heard the words "this is his wife, grab her a chair" and was told that after hooking Angel to a EEG they did not see any brain activity and would continue to monitor for the next 24 hours. On January 19th Angel was given an Apnea test and was declared brain dead. I agreed to donate his organs because when he was alive he was very giving and if he could help even just one family from going through what we did he would have agreed himself. Well he helped two recipients. I think the main reason this is so difficult for me is I never imagined any complications with the surgery, so all I said to him before surgery was I Love You and I will be here when you wake up and gently kissed him.

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At 12:34pm on December 17, 2009, melissa whaley said…
so sorry with you loss it is very hard to get used to living or new lives that is how i feel loosing my daughter she was just 15 . I just try to keep in mind all the blessings i still have and hope some day my experiance can help some one else
 
 
 

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Gary Ruby is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Nov 5
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Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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Natasha commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"is griefshare a website like this?"
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Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
Sep 26
Kali added a discussion to the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
Sep 26
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