Michelle B.
  • Female
  • Norman, OK
  • United States
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  • Brenda Ann

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About Me:
55 years old, 4 children, 3 still teenagers in high school, lawyer
About my Loss:
My husband and his brother were killed at construction site where they were working. It was a beautiful Friday in September and the whole family was looking forward to the weekend. Band contest for the kids the next day, just puttering around otherwise. I got the call at 2 p.m.

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At 1:47pm on March 20, 2015, Brenda Ann said…

Dear Michelle,

     One will never be a burden to anyone here on this site. Please feel free to talk about anything at any time. Grief isn't a destination - it is a very personal journey which we all travel in our own time and our own way. Still there is one common need and that is to talk.

     "Talking can be a helpful release. Following the death of all ten of his children, as well as some other personal tragedies, the ancient patriarch Job said: “My soul certainly feels a loathing toward my life. I will give vent to [Hebrew, “loose”] my concern about myself. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul!” (Job 1:2, 18, 19; 10:1) Job could no longer restrain his concern. He needed to let it loose; he had to “speak.” Similarly, the English dramatist Shakespeare wrote in Macbeth: “Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o’er-fraught heart and bids it break.”
So talking about your feelings to “a true companion” who will listen patiently and sympathetically can bring a measure of relief. (Proverbs 17:17) Putting experiences and feelings into words often makes it easier to understand them and to deal with them. And if the listener is another bereaved person who has effectively dealt with his or her own loss, you may be able to glean some practical suggestions on how you can cope. When her child died, one mother explained why it helped to talk to another woman who had faced a similar loss: “To know that somebody else had gone through the same thing, had come out whole from it, and that she was still surviving and finding some sort of order in her life again was very strengthening to me.”
     I hope this helps. . .

Brenda

 
 
 

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