Lena Kaplun
  • Female
  • Olympia, WA
  • United States
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About my Loss:
In the span of 8 months between 2005 and 2006, my dad, grandpa, grandma, and mom passed away, in that order. I was fourteen when my dad had a heart attack, and fifteen by the time my mom died. We were a very close-knit family. My mom struggled with cancer since I was 12 or 13. My dad had a massive heart attack - probably from all the stress and unhealthy coping mechanisms - and died six days later. Then, his parents - they were of a ripe old age, but I think it was the grief that drove them over the edge. They died two weeks apart, a couple of months after my dad. My mom planned all the funerals while getting chemo; not completely on her own, we had supportive family and friends, but it took a toll. She died 8 months after my dad.

I'm 20 now. It's taken me a while to address my feelings - and they've been coming out in weird ways. I've seen quite a few therapists. Right now, I'm between anger and acceptance, it seems; as in I've worked past the anger, and close to acceptance. In any case, I'm finally crying. I'm in a committed relationship and we've been together for about 2 and a half years; I've found myself externalizing a lot of my emotions and being unrealistic about my expectations. I've felt alienated for a long time, and I've never been part of any kind of grief support network.

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