Not looking forward to Christmas
It's been a long time since I've posted a Blog on here but I am not looking forward to Christmas I am notBecause the people should be here it's no longer hereSee More
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Jennifer Walde
- Female
- Pasadena, TX
- United States
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Profile Information
- About Me:
- I'm 29. I'm a college student completing my bachelor's degree in homeland security and emergency management this year. My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years.I have 2 dogs. I love the outdoors and swimming,painting, flying airplanes, travel, trying new things, cooking, gardening, running, hiking, arcades, movies, making people laugh, making clay sculptures, singing, and math.I believe in God and am active in my Christian faith.
- About my Loss:
- My daughter Avalynn was born after a very difficult pregnancy at 41 weeks via emergency csection. She wasn't breathing. With some effort they were able to revive her and send her for tests, and life flight her to the nicu. When I came out of recovery my husband and I were shown her xray, and told that my daughter had an abnormal skeleton, almost no lungs, an enlarged heart, and they didn't expect her to live. After 3 days I was finally discharged and allowed to drive to the children's hospital my daughter was at. 7 weeks later she came home on hospice. 7 weeks after that she was admitted to the inpatient hospice facility, and a week and a half later she starved to death while suffering heart, respiratory, renal, and liver failure. She suffered greatly despite our best efforts. But she was also one of the most loving, happy, peaceful, intelligent children I've ever known. She said everything with her expressive gorgeous hazel eyes, and her flirty, bashful smile. I held her as she took her last breaths, and waited for her heart to stop beating. I was with her every day of her life, with exception of those first 3 days. She was my 24/7. We didn't have a live in nurse,or anything, I, dealt with all her life support machines,medicine, dnr, etcetc.I miss her with every part of my soul. She was my soul mate.
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Jennifer Walde's Blog
My angel's passing a year later
Avalynn died June 13, 2015. Though it has been just over a year, my heart is still heavy. I often feel dismissed by friends and family who feel I should be over it by now. They grew impatient a long time ago. So I'm not sure how to deal with the loneliness that is only meant for her to fill. Whether good or difficult memories of her suffering, I cry because I get jealous of myself holding her in that moment. I want so badly to look her in her eyes and see her life, her soul, her joy, trust,…
ContinuePosted on August 14, 2016 at 5:03pm
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"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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Jennifer,
Avalynn is a beautiful baby. Her smile is so adorable!
I truly am sorry for your loss. {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}
--bluebird