Jeanie Bear Den
  • Female
  • New Orleans, LA
  • United States
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About Me:
I am 65 Y/O. My husband of 44 years committed suicide June 4, 2015. I am on medication and in therapy, but it isn't getting any easier.
About my Loss:
My husband and I were married 44 years, most of which time he battled alcoholism. I tried all the things codependent/enablers try. When I finally stopped doing those things, I locked myself in a room and painted sun faces. I visited my sister in another city; my husband was never pleased about spending time alone, and drank while I was away, never eating, only drinking, and talking about suicide - he even joined the Hemlock Society. Our 35 Y/O son lived next door, and took his keys and wallet. That morning, I was at my sister's, my son called and said, "He did it!" He took a gun and shot himself in the head; my son heard the shot and found him. I was in shock and allowed others to make my decisions for me. We sold the house and everything in it for pennies and went to Hawaii to buy a printing business, which didn't work, because neither of us were in any condition to do anything, much less start a new life without my husband. I don't know how to live without him. I don't look forward to life without him. Now, I have no home, no car, no life. My sister is ill and I am taking care of her. I resent it, her and my husband for killing himself. I am at a total loss as to what to do, or how to do anything.

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It's been a long time since I've posted a Blog on here but I am not looking forward to Christmas I am notBecause the people should be here it's no longer hereSee More
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