Brittany
  • Female
  • Milwaukee, WI
  • United States
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Denise D replied to Brittany's discussion Loss of boyfriend due to motorcycle in the group Traumatic, Sudden Loss
"Hi Brittany, I know it's been 4 years since your post.  I just found this site and wanted to respond because I experienced a similar shocking and tragic loss 3 months ago.  My boyfriend got hit by a car and died instantly.  We…"
Jan 31, 2021

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About my Loss:
Boyfriend passed away due to a motorcycle accident

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At 1:41pm on December 2, 2016, Lindsay said…

Hi Brittany, I sent you some messages on chat. I'm very sorry for your loss. It is still so early for you so I'm sure you might still be in shock over what has happened. I believe Kyle will send you signs. This happened for me a lot in those first few months, at least that's what I choose to believe. I felt things that I can't explain with my whole heart and soul and that brought me some comfort. I tried to keep myself busy by writing down all the special memories we shared, things we laughed at together, special things about him that made my heart beat faster. Sometimes I will go back and read those journals just to feel close to him.

You are so young- I am a few years older than you- and one of the hardest parts of losing a love at a young age is the isolation. None of my friends have been through this so many avoided me in fear of upsetting by bringing up his name. It has been extremely hard to watch other people live their lives while I live in hell and pain missing the person who made me so giddy. I still have bad days and it's almost two years since he has been gone. 

Therapy is good for something like this. This forum is also helpful and supportive if you feel your friends and family cannot relate. 

My advice is cry when you need to. Don't hold in the hurt, that will only make it worse. Try talking to him. Print any pictures of him and make a memory box, anything to preserve the memory of him. 

Hugs to you.

At 1:05pm on December 2, 2016, Lisa Stansbury said…

Oh Brittany, I am so sorry.  I lost two dear ones in a very sudden traumatic way and felt the same thing with the second one.  I knew something was wrong -- I went running to the hospital...  I just knew.  And he was already gone.   So, yes I understand.  But no... nobody else really knows what your grief process will be like.  Try to sleep, try to walk through each day the best you can.  Whatever you need to do, do it.   don't be surprised if you feel like he is right there with you sometimes.  Don't be surprised if you look up and notice that a pencil has moved -- and you didn't move it!  Or something else has changed in your environment and it wasn't you who did it.  He will leave you a sign, somehow, someway, to let you know that he is okay.  Now you have to be as okay as you can be.   Nobody else in your peer group at your age will really be able to understand.  That's okay.  Who would want them to have to go through this to understand?  But just know that he made you different, your love made you different, and losing him this way has made you different now.  Take as much care of yourself as you can.  therapy, massages, whatever it takes.  It's tough.  And know.. that somewhere...he still loves you very very much.   

  

 
 
 

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Gary Ruby is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
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Julie is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Nov 5
Speed Weasel commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
Oct 21
Natasha commented on Speed Weasel's blog post A Return to GriefShare and a Crisis of Identity
"is griefshare a website like this?"
Oct 21
dream moon JO B updated their profile
Oct 16
Morgan Sangrouber is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Oct 10
Addie replied to Kali's discussion It was not supposed to be like this in the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
"Kali I’m so so sorry you are going through this. Grief is hard enough, but going through it secretly, all the while having to continue showing up for your kids, is just brutal. Perhaps your friend was careful to hide your conversations behind…"
Sep 26
Kali added a discussion to the group Being the Other Woman/Other Man
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It was not supposed to be like this

In 2014 I met the most amazing man ever. We were both in our very early 20s and were looking for different things at the time. We ceased communication for roughly 6 months. During which time, he completed basic training and joined the Air Force. By the time we reconnected he was already at his first duty station.. 8 hours away.We decided we wanted to continue our relationship and proceeded to cultivate a deeply emotional connection. Regular calls and video chats, visits while he was home on…See More
Sep 26

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