Dear Barbara, I am so very sirry for your loss. I lost my only chold last Dec.1, 2012, Getting through those anniverssaries are so tough/ On what would have been his 18th birhday, my husband got atatoo in his memory. We find it helps to plan to do something on those days. Even if is taking a drive to a beautiful place. As the holidays loom ahead, I am not doing very well. No Halloween yhis year - first time since since he was born, Thanksgiving will be a brief visit with my aunt (most of my family is on the East Coast where we will go for Christmas). But just as hard as going, is coming back to the empty house.  I am stuck between not being able to imagine leaving this home where my son was born and raised and died and being here so much that the memories become too hard to bear. My faith is stronger now. I do believe his spirit lives on and that he is with me when I need him. But this is not what my life is supposed to be. I will never have his grandchild and frankly all the things we've been working for are just "things" that no one really wants. His college fund we have dispersed to others who are in need. He had Crohn;'s dsease and so I only worked part time and so spent most of my time researching the disease, finding doctors, going to treatments, etc. After he suffered so much, he then died in a tragic car accident as a passenger. How do we make sense of it? we don't. We have to find some way to live our lives to make them proud. When just getting out of bed is hard I find it hard to get any mojo to live a giving, productive life. I try but I just want my son back. It is normal to have days where your emotions are everywhere and then some. When you feel like no one gets it and  you can't talk to those you love the most. It is difficult for two people who are in great pain to comfort each other. Perhaps writing your son a letter might help. You don't even have to ever give it o him if you decide not to but it helps me get my thoughts and feelings a little more i order I wish I could make your pain less but I can only offer an ear and a shoulder to cry on. You are not alone and are safe to express yourself here. Sending you prayers.

I lost my 22 year old son Brandon on May 2 of this year...I am so sorry for you...I am also deep in depression and often feel like I want to scream at everyone because nobody will talk about it with me...and often I feel like they don't want me around because I'm so down and no fun...how can I ever be FUN anymore....my baby is GONE and there was nothing I could do to stop it from happening..at least nothing I KNEW to do...and I wonder all the time if maybe there WAS something I could have done...and then I get this horrible lump inside and feel like I'm going to vomit...and I don't know what to do to make the horror go away...

Barbara, I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone.  We are all here with you.  We understand because we also live it.  Family and friends that have not lost a child can not fully understand what this is like.

I'm sorry I don't know what you can do about your son's friend.  Maybe he just needs some time.

Post on the wall of 'Missing my son or daughter' for more contact.

Sending you hugs.  

Barbara, I lost my son Christopher exactly one week after your son passed away. Our losses are so fresh. My son died suddenly while on an anniversary cruise with his wife. Like you, I am devastated. My prayers are with you.

Hi Barbara I as well lost my son it will be 10 months on 4/18/13 that is always a hard day for me. I am so sorry for your loss he was so young. I am also new to this sight and just trying to ease my pain some, I hope maybe we can talk and try and help one another out