Amy S
  • 51, Female
  • Powell, TN
  • United States
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  • Amber
  • Mark Hundley
  • glenna bittinger
  • Angel Jason's Mom
  • Jacob Michael scott McLeod-Steinmetz
  • Diana, Grief Recovery Coach

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About Me:
I'm a 35 year old mother and wife. I have seven beautiful children ranging in agaes from 4 to 16, five boys and two girls. Three are from my previous marriage, four are from my current marriage. I have been happily married for eleven years to Mark, a wonderful man. He served in the Navy for 22 years and retired from it last year. Our final duty station was Italy, where we lived for almost four years. An amazing experience!

Because Mark was offered a job and his dream of attending UT law school, we decided to settle in a small town outside of Knoxville, Tennessee. I enjoy it here and love living just a few hours drive from my wonderful in-laws.

I'm a full time mom to my youngest four, and my three teenagers live in Mississippi with their dad and other mom. I feel very blessed to have so much love and support in my life.
About my Loss:
My mom passed away suddenly in her sleep on April, 13, 2008. She was 62 years old. My mom was a wonderful woman. She was a stay at home mom and raised five kids. My mom and dad married at a young age, mom was 14 and dad was 18. They had been married 48 years at the time of mom's passing.

Mom had heart problems for about 12 years at the time of her passing, but nothing that would have made any of us believe she could suddenly die. She had been in the hospital a few month before she died because she was having serious problems with her bowels. She dropped 30 pounds in less then two months.

Mom had a colonoscopy that showed she had polyps on her colon, but no cancer, or so the doctor said.

No autopsy was performed on my mom, even at our request. The coroner ruled her death as natural causes. And though we absolutely know she died from some sort of health problem, we don't know exactly what from. The not knowing is what is so hard for me to deal with.

I miss her. I miss not picking up the phone and calling her when one of my kids have done something funny. I miss her telling me even though I was in my 30's, I was still her baby. (I'm the youngest of my siblings) I miss her laugh, her sweetness, her warm heart. I miss seeing her throwing a ball with my boys in the backyard, and seeing her paint my four year old daughter's nails. I miss seeing her and dad together.

I never knew I could feel this kind of pain...

I have found that when you lose a parent, no matter your age or their age, you become child-like again. You feel helpless, scared, small.

My dad moved from Oregon to Tennessee to live with us after mom died, and what a wonderful feeling having him here! I love that he is around my children, and I'm glad he is here so we can help each other through this time.

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Amy S's Blog

Mark, Dad & My life now

I always thought my husband could fix anything. I mean he always had! If I was upset or angry, he just seem to talk me through it and I was Ok again.



Then mom died, and even Mark couldn't fix it.



I remember the night I got the phone call that mommy had passed away. My sister called and told me mom had passed away, (I have two sisters in Oregon, and two brothers in Utah) but it's like I wasn't really hearing it. I remember saying 'What' like three times, then just yelling.… Continue

Posted on February 8, 2009 at 4:00pm — 1 Comment

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At 9:43pm on February 8, 2009, Jacob Michael scott McLeod-Steinmetz said…
Dear Amy
Thank you for visiting my Jacob's page
I'm so sorry for your loss ...it was so sudden for you I know though your Mum is watching over you and your Dad

I lost My Mother is October 2008 ..and My youngest son Jacob to Aml leukaemia 16-06-05 I miss him with every beat of my heart

May your Mother fly high in heaven Happy healthy sending kisses and love to surround you always
Love always ^i^ Jacob's mUm
Leukaemia sux! www.caringbridge.org/me/jacob
At 3:16pm on February 7, 2009, Amber said…
And your in my thoughts as well. My mom also passed when she was sleeping which really is the best way to go.... I miss not getting her hugs and her advice. I miss shopping with her.... There are so many more things I understand now, that I didn't when I was 14 and we could have really connected even more. She'll never see the woman I become. She'll never get the chance to hold her grandchild. She missed my sweet sixteen and she'll never see me graduate..... Man, it's just too much sometimes.
But you just have to believe that there will be that day again where you'll see her. Believing in that is the only thing that keeps me together.
I'm so sorry for the loss you had to endure. Thank you so much for being so nice. And for the friend request. :)
At 6:35am on February 7, 2009, Diana, Grief Recovery Coach said…
I'm weeping right now. I really don't know what I would do if I lost my mom. I am shocked that you requested an autopsy and it was not done. I seriously wonder why. My heart goes out to you and I wish I could hug you. But for now I will send you some virtual (((((hugs))))).
 
 
 

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