"GriefShare is a church based support group. They do have meetings online, but the usual format is a group of people experiencing a loss getting together weekly to watch videos (13 weeks total) about grief and loss. After the video, we talk about the…"
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My wife
On January 26th of this year, my whole life was changed forever. My wife of 44 years was killed in an automobile accident. She was riding with a co-worker from their place of employment to where I work, and from there she and I would have gone home. Our home, our dream home, was only just purchased in December. We spent our first night there on Dec. 20th. This was to be our retirement home where we would live out the rest of our years together. She only got to enjoy it for just over a month. But now she is gone. I miss her so very much. I cry every day, sometimes the entire day. I feel so empty. I ask God every day to let me die so that I might be with her. Nothing matters to me any more.
She and I were high school sweethearts. We went steady for about a year and we were engaged another year before getting married. She was the first girl I ever kissed.
We did everything together. I never wanted to be away from her, and she felt the same about me. I am so lonely now. As I said, nothing matters to me any more. I have lost everything. I would give anything to have her back. I miss holding her, hearing her voice and seeing her smile. I sit and look at photos and I think how beautiful she was.
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Sal in a sari.jpg, 165 KB -
Sally.JPG, 1.5 MB
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Orville Hamman Jr. on
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Thought I would give an update. My grief finally consumed me and on March 31st I had a breakdown. I am now seeing my doctor every couple weeks, am on antidepressants and I am seeing a therapist once a week. I am adjusting to Sal being gone, but I still miss her terribly. Each day now is a bit easier. I have lost 41 pounds in 3 months. I am working on some of the things that my wife and I were going to do. I want to do them for her. Shortly after my breakdown I wrote a poem to her. It's not great but it says what I felt/feel.
To Sally
You went away
Some time ago
When all was white
Covered in snow
We laid you to rest
On a cold, snowy day
After first we went
To the church to pray
We had such plans
Just you and I
I was not ready
For you to die
To grow old together
That was our goal
But over death
We have no control
To have you back
I would give anything
To hold the hand
That wears my ring
To hear your voice
To see your smile
If only for
a little while
By the tears I shed
I hope you see
How much you truly
Meant to me
I miss you dearly
I hope you know
How I’ll go on
I do not know
Just know I loved you
I love you still
I love you Sal
I always will
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Orville I am sorry for your great loss. Having a relationship that deep I can certainly relate. It is going to be very difficult to carry on but you can do it. Cherish those precious memories. in your really dark moments just say a prayer for strength. I don't know how religious you are but prayer helps, that and having supportive friends and family. Keep strong and you are in my prayers.
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