I hope it's okay to post here... I feel as if I've lost my whole family, though my dad is still physically alive. He has MS and dementia, and his health and mental well-being have severely declined. I had to put him in a nursing home recently. I find myself almost expecting every phone call to be "the one" I've experienced twice now (well, I was with my mom and brother all through their illnesses and death, but I mean the one that I will get that gut feeling and know it will be anytime now...)

My mom died of cancer in 2011 (13 month fight). My brother in 2012 (5 week fight). I'm 34 years old now, and I know nobody who, at my age, is or soon will be the sole survivor in their family. I saw someone say as I was looking around that it's alienating. That is exactly what I'm experiencing as well. I feel so utterly alone and lost in life. I never, ever imagined that I would be in this position, and finding support (although I have a WONDERFUL therapist) from those who understand has been all but impossible for me. Until now...!

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So sorry

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It was not supposed to be like this

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