My fiance died in a work accident June 25th and left behind myself and our now 6 month old daughter. I don't know how to do this without him and feel like I am still waiting for him to come home... We had decided the night before the accident to get married next summer and now we never get that. It breaks my heart that our beautiful baby girl will never know the amazing man who loved her so completely and deeply. I have never seen a man more in love with his child... I loved watching them together. He came into my life when I was dealing with some issues from my past and that all vanished the night I met him. We were inseperable from the moment we met and he was my perfect match and my best friend. I miss him so much and it is so hard to grieve when I have a baby to take care of. She is my only reason for being now and without her I don't know where I would be. Things feel like they are getting harder rather than easier... We are burying his ashes this friday and I know it's not going to be easy.  His family has not really been a part of our lives since the accident as I don't believe they validate our relationship.  The least they could do would be to check in and see how the baby is doing but even that is few and far between. I just want him back. We deserved more time together and he is needed here more than whatever God needs him for.

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Kali, Im so sorry for your loss.  If it seems to be getting harder it is probably that the numbness that sets in at first is wearing off and the reality that this is for keeps is setting in.  My husband has been gone for over a year now and my days are calmer now than they were last year.  I cant say they are getting better because better would be if my son and husband had not died!  It must be very hard to have to put  your grief away to parent your daughter, but she does give you a wonderful reason to get out of bed every day.  Take gentle care. 

I know this sounds unbelievable, but you will get through this.  I lost my husband of 33 years 5 months ago to a sudden heart attack.  I have sought out help through a grief counseling group, church and I read a devotional called "Jesus Calling" almost every day.  I also go to a christian based spin class which is a great physical outlet for all the pain you are feeling.  Try getting out a a bike and ride as hard as you can.  It does something I promise.  Believe that God has a plan for you and your daughter.  You will find happiness again, but you have to seek it out.  I am living this with you and I have found happiness again.  It can and will happen. 

Hi, I was just wondering how long did it take you to find happiness again?  My husband died 3 months ago unexpected from a heart attack and I feel such saddness and feel I'll never be normal and happy again.  Did you remarry?

Kali, I am sorry for the loss of you fiance.  Your family is beautiful.  It's a blessing that your daughter is with you. A piece of him is here in her. (she is a doll)  She will give you the strength to go on as difficult as that my be. And she will know her father loves her because of the stories and photos you will show and tell her. I am sorry that you have not received much support from his family.  I can relate to that. My fiance passed away on April 27 2012 and his family really did not approve of us. So when he passed I too received a cold shoulder..  But what is important is that Chris loved you and his daughter.  This web site is a blessing. It is always here for us to turn to in our hours of sadness.

Bless you and your beautiful daughter.

Thank you so much for your kind words. I haven't been on here in quite some time but it means a lot.

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