Comment

Comment by Michelle H on March 22, 2018 at 5:07pm

Yesterday was the 5th anniversary of my son's sudden death. I can scarcely believe it's been that long. This is a hard journey.

Comment by Ginger on March 19, 2018 at 4:44pm

• Today is 1 month and 1 day that my daughter passed away from cancer and I miss her every day, so much so that I won't put her picture away because I don't want to forget her.

Comment by Grace on March 11, 2018 at 12:59pm

So....May 29 the will be 9 years..... I have the hole in my heart....I have tried to fill in some of that space by my memorial fund that gives families that have folk with special needs and serious medical issues hugs with random acts of kindness donation.  It helps to see the generosity of the donors and the emotional impact it has made for recipients.  Yes there is a void that will never be filled.....and it should never be gotten over.....but we all make a journey through it.....  Blessings to all of the ones who are still at the starting point....and maybe the finish line is at our own time to pass through this Journey to our next beginning.....PEACE 

Comment by Jesse's Mom on February 24, 2018 at 4:46pm

Hello, I have read through the comments left and have to say at a little over 5 years much is the same as what others wrote.

I have lost many contacts through this -- I have seen people behave in ways towards me and my family that were unimaginable. Many had an idea of how we should respond to the unrepentant girl who ran over my son...and made it clear their views of us...I trust no one now really...

Of course, all of those who pointed fingers or simply dumped on us went on in their life...we tend to isolate now...

I think this coming of spring can bring about anxiety all on its own...new beginnings except for us...no one in my circle can understand the level of hell we go through each day...yet my husband and I try to hold it together for my daughter's sake and grand children...

Teresa, sending healing prayers for your daughter...

I am sorry Windsor the additional pain you are facing...

To newcomers, I am sorry you have found the need for this type of group...it is a hard journey. 

I found this web site by Carol Kearns helpful early on in my grief journey...the author lost her daughter to drowning and later became a grief counselor. She was mentored by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. 

http://www.carolkearns.com/kristens-legacy/overview.html

Comment by B.Windsor on February 6, 2018 at 5:50pm

My heart continues to ache for all who have lost or/and continue to lose loved ones.  It is truly a heavy burden.  *Much love to you all!  Thank you--those who work for the site and comment and just keep going!  

i just wanted to share a brief update.  This past weekend, we traveled a few hours each way, so i could meet my grandson--finally.  It was a bit weird, since both his father and grandfather believed i was there to try to take Gabriel, and not simply visit.  (i'd tried calling several times, throughout January, as well as the first day of February, without anyone answering the phone.  *sigh)  So, i broke it down to them both, and made sure they understood my stance.  Needless to say, we visited for a few hours, and all i can truly say about my grandson:  He's his mother's child!  And, he's a trough of energy--not just a bowlful!  He looks so much like her, too.  i just hope they can keep at least some of their "word," since i've not had the best experience with that, as of yet.  

Comment by Judy Pugh on January 15, 2018 at 6:56pm

I’m so sorry Virginia. Life is so hard after a loss such as ours. Just know there are many people who understand your pain, people you will never meet but who have gone through this anguish you are feeling. You will make it through, please be gentle with yourself. 

Comment by Virginia on January 15, 2018 at 11:23am

I lost my beautiful daughter on 12/21/17.  I don't know what else to say, I think that says it all.  I am sad beyond belief. I don't want to be at home, I don't want to go to work.  Being around people is hard: either they don't talk to me because they don't know what to say, or they just want to tell me how sorry they are which makes me cry.  I feel I am neglecting my son, but it is so hard to play with him and try to have fun, when I am thinking of my daughter every minute of every day.

Comment by Bern on January 1, 2018 at 9:41pm

Here we are another year and no sons...Life is so changed. I just can not log in daily, it became overwhelming.

Comment by B.Windsor on January 1, 2018 at 1:06pm

It's hard enough trying to go on since Shelby died...but, the mess my ex and his mother keep pulling really don't help anything/anyone.  *sigh  i've second-guessed every step i've ever made, since her death, and it's not getting ANY easier.  i came back to NC to try and reconnect with my son, as well as visit some with my grandson, and get to know him.  i've called my son--spoke to him briefly, before the call dropped--and texted him to let him know i'm in the state and whenever he's ready to talk, i should be around.  (He's in the military now.)  My grandson's father has answered the phone once, in the many times i've tried calling him, these past several months.  He asked me to call back the following day, since they would be there the whole time.  He did not answer.  i tried the following day.  No answer.  i've even tried since, knowing my grandson is with my ex, just to see what's going on or if he's having reservations or what his deal is.  All i keep thinking:  he's partying and using, still.  My grandson deserves a better life than that.  i don't want to create any tidal waves, but if he is using, something HAS to change. As i'm writing this, i'm looking out the window....It's a beautiful cold day, but, my mind goes elsewhere.  i'm tired.  i'm fed up with all the games people play.  No one seems capable of keeping their word anymore.  *sigh  Most people just can't get it, nor give a hoot about trying.  But, no matter how much i do or plead, she's never coming back--she is dead, after all.  God, that  hurts....i still can't take her off my contact lists.  i know if or when i do, it'll be a definite finality.  Just wish i could give up and let go and forget about this world.  All it's ever done for me is cause me more pain and suffering.  

Comment by Teresa D. on December 23, 2017 at 8:43am

Judy, I lost my son Michael and yet I still can't imagine the grief you must feel.  It's hard to say Merry Christmas but I hope you find a second of peace. 

it's been a while since I've been here.  For my old friends my daughters ovarian cancer is stage 1.  To me it's not good but it's the best of the worst. 

I've bonded very strongly with one of our members, so much so we visited this summer.  Now I can't live without her, she is my sister now. 

For me it's like you run out of words. You repeat yourself so much you get sick of yourself.  I do anyway. 

When I first started this room was very active and the people in it (except for Dennis) supported me like others couldn't and for that I will never forget any of you.

I'm 5 years in and have no words of wisdom for anyone.  Early on I was told you'll learn to wear a fake face and you'll learn to manage it.  Those things yes, I'm doing today.  It was a process to get there and I have not mastered either one.  Sometimes that fake face starts to crack. 

I still cry daily, sometimes with no warning, but it's now normal to me.  This is who I am now.

I love you all and I hope through the holidays everyone can find one moment of peace.

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