Hi, My daughter and I are going to Los Cabos for four days in February since I have decided that maybe the sun will find a path into the darkness I feel.
My husband loved the ocean, so I will walk along the beach and look out into the sea looking for nature to give me some healing. It seems like I have been living in "winter" so long! I feel like the autumn leaf that has dried up and has no life left. I once had my day in the sun as the "Memories" song states, I do not have much hope that I will ever be happy again, but, just maybe, I can have a little warmth for a few days. I am so tired of feeling sad, lonely, depressed, and in despair. As so many of you have said, "this is no life".
Hopefully, I will return and have the energy and the will to go on to face the days ahead. I just need to do something to gain some strength, or I will not make it. My new mantra is that each night I say, "another day gone, how many more do I have to endure?".

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For some reason your post came through my e-mail... i don't usually get notifications from this site. I used the link but didn't immediately find your post but searched for it because I just felt I needed to reach out to you. I was with my husband for 26 years - married for 22 when he died at the young age of 49....complications from diabetes. We have 2 living children and together lost a child at the age of 6 to congenital heart disease. I miss him every day and mourn for my children not having their dad but in the meantime life has gone on. I have met a man that also lost his wife at too early an age due to diabetes. I love him as much as I loved my dear husband and life is new and joyful again. I felt compelled to tell you that there is hope and happiness and I believe your husband, and daughter would want you to search for happiness again. Life is for the living!! You are here! Embrace the Grace of God, find the message in the ocean from your dear husband and know that he would only want happiness for you.
Thanks, but I was married for 55+ years and am now 77; I do not really want to find any happiness; I just want to leave this earth and call it a day. My husband and I always said we wanted to go together since we didn't think we could make it after all these years together if we lost each other. I think if I was young, like you, then there might be some hope of a future, but not now. I certainly could never be with another man, but I am happy that you found another love. I wish you happiness and a bright future. I appreciate you taking the time to respond in a caring way.

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