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Comment by michael sandoval on October 6, 2012 at 4:24pm

My Mommy.  I love and miss you Mom

Comment by michael sandoval on October 6, 2012 at 4:22pm

Thank you Joni

Comment by joni on October 6, 2012 at 4:15pm

To michael...very sorry for your loss...prayers and hugs to you

Comment by michael sandoval on October 5, 2012 at 6:55pm

My Mom passed away on 9/28/12 funeral was yesterday. very sad.  have been posting in the "I miss my mom" group lately.

Comment by RUTH on October 5, 2012 at 6:34pm

This will be the first holiday "Canada Thanksgiving" without my mom. Work was hard today hearing about all the plans people had with their parents, family...and well wishes for a nice thanksgiving. I mean there are still many things I give thanks for but...just miss my mother. I have a very young niece who is sick and right now is in emergency department since yesterday not knowing is wrong with her and an aunt who is having complications from chemo, and a pet dog who has heart disease and not doing well today at all....illness just needs to stop! So this weekend will be really no fun...plans to clean and all but no motivation...just sadness....can't visit my mom's grave to make sure she is ok cause she is buried in another province...this post really makes no sense....sorry

Comment by joni on September 28, 2012 at 3:33pm

Love & prayers Michael

Just need to vent for a minute... It's coming up on a year and I'm just so afraid and lost...I just can't believe he's gone sometimes and as memories surface it brings everything right back to day one...I just have a really hard time with the fact that until diagnosed on oct 18 with stage 4 lung cancer my husband was pretty healthy ....how can this be and right up till the end he showed no signs of lung cancer??? Just dont get it...and I was in a strong denial that he was dying and believed he would be healed...so what is God trying to say....just sooooo hurt and confused and scared??? God help us all

Comment by michael sandoval on September 28, 2012 at 11:05am

My mom doesn't have cancer, but she is about to pass.  God bless you mom.

Comment by Mark on September 24, 2012 at 11:15pm

Just now saw on yahoo Bonnie Franklin ( the mom from one day at a time)  has been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.  What is up with this thing?  This cancer is so brutal.  In less than 5 days I had my mom transferred to one of the best teaching hospitals in California with a lot of experience in treating Pancreatic Cancer and even they admitted this is the bear.  Chemo can't kill it.  The whipple is the only procedure to attempt removal but may present other life threatening results.  pet scans don't catch it early.  It took us 4 months to get a diagnosis after many tests and failing health.  They still didn't catch it had spread until they opened her up. There was nothing they could do at that point.  This disease also masks itself early on mimicking all kinds of other ailments that most doctors write off as the initial problem.  Research must increase on this one. 

Comment by Angel on September 24, 2012 at 4:16pm

Oh Mark....I understand...more than you know...when my husband passed everyone desserted me...no one wanted to be around me...whether or not friends thought I was a threat to their husbands or I was contagious because of all my losses I don't know..you are so right...the only people who understand are those who have had their hearts ripped out of their chests...no one tries to "milk compassion" but we all need our souls and hearts fed and nurtured after horrible losses...."balance" is a touch one...it does come...at different times for different people..there are no rights and wrongs with grief...we all grieve differently and in our own pattern...I had the anger stage hit me one year after my husband passed and 15 after my daughter...my husband passed on my deceased daughter's birthday so needless to say ...it is an impossible day to get through without fesr, panic, pain and anger...to say the least...and I will live with this day the rest of my life...Yes some do beat cancer....I watched my husband go through hell and pain that no human should suffer fighting...and fighting...and then he got tired of fighting...and although neither of us wanted to let go of the other we had to...I am here for you as are all the others....anytime you want to scream...do it...I did use God as my sounding board..and at times screamed and cried by myself at might and begged him to please take the pain away....I did get relief....but I had to believe I would ...that He would help me and He did..I wish you whatever peace you can find in your heart for this day. Angel

Comment by Mark on September 24, 2012 at 3:13pm

Hi Angel.  This place is honestly the only place I have ever really vented in depth because I feel guilty about expressing how I feel.   In public no one has a clue whats really going on inside of me as I've said repeatedly over and over "I'm doing well" when asked how I am.  I think they'd be shocked.  It's probably why some disappeared to avoid stuff like that.  I never want anyone to think I'm trying to milk any type of compassion.  I sit and crave balance.  What I mean by that is I just wish life were distributed fairly.  Some will beat cancer.  They are so lucky.  I'm happy for them but you can't help but ask why not my mom?  It's stuff like that which eats away at me. 

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