Don't grieve alone; 14,000 members and growing
This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.
Members: 632
Latest Activity: Jun 13, 2022
Started by Shane Hughes Apr 16, 2020.
Started by Michael Thompson. Last reply by morgan May 12, 2019.
Started by Felicia Evans May 8, 2018.
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Good afternoon, I am dealing with my grief on a day to day basis. I have noticed that I dream of Mark often--he calls me and we talk or we are together somewhere. These dreams have been very pleasant until the last few days. Toward the end of these dreams I always remember that Mark is now deceased---in one I was trying to warn him that the cancer was going to take him LONG before we thought. In another, I recognized that he was gone and I was not really talking to him at all. Has anyone had these kinds of dreams????
saw smthng on tv abot big c abot panrate big c nevr gets mush warng abot it lk othr big c it evn saed mre pele get killed by it
iv lots so mny famly on my dads sde 2 big c i hav
iv evn got fmly nw try 2 beat ot frm in laws 2 blood fmly i dnt sea mush famly till bad thngs happen ths days
im so srooy fr evry s loss 2 ths evil dese but nevr let any 1 tel u 2 get over it or bully u 2 get over it coz its nt rht we sud be alowd 2 griv or own way
jo
Marsha, I do have pictures and a few items he bought me over the years, but I wanted his pocket knife and a few personal things that I saw him carry him everyday. I will be fine, I know, but I can sympathize with how you feel. The law and what is right can sometimes be very different things!
Vicky: I am so sorry you have nothing of your love's possessions. It has helped a lot to have things to hold and remember. My husband and I were never legally married: we were common-law for 19 years and shared many good times. But, after his death, his sister who lives 3000 miles away wanted me to ship all his belongings to her because I was not family. I did not do this and do not feel guilty at all. I hope you have pictures of some of your activities at least.
Oh Marsha, I am so sorry! I just don't see how they can be "cancer free" one moment and then gone so very soon thereafter! In my case, my fiancé made a provisional will the day the oncologist said he had six months---he died a week later and never got well enough to stipulate anything in his will. We had dated for several years and I moved in once he became ill. Has his family offered me one single thing of his? NO. So, compounding my grief over losing him and our future, I have nothing of his, even though he had promised I would be taken care of. Things sure can be unfair in life, can't they? You hang in and keep in touch. I'll be thinking about you.
It's been 2 months since my husband, Ray, passed away from liver failure brought on by chemo from lung cancer treatments. The doctors kept saying everything was ok...cancer was gone. But just days after the last treatment he passed out and was never the same. 6 weeks later he was gone. I, like you, am in shock. He was supposed to get his strength back so we could retire together this year. Now I can no longer retire on my monies alone and all our plans are for naught. I really miss him and would welcome him back even if we had to still work and never retire. It just seems all the planning and hoping and him being ill from the treatments were a waste of time.
Laurie, I sort of feel like I have lived both sides of this issue. My loved one had esophageal cancer last year and through an esophagectomy, radiation, and chemo he became cancer free. We made definitive plans to marry then.........all of a suddenly one morning he woke up jaundiced. Within 3 weeks he was gone--it was sudden for all of us at that point. The oncologist had just given him six months......after that prognosis he lived exactly one week. So, while I did have time to think about losing him and realizing I could, I had not really believed that he would not be a survivor. May time bring you peace.
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